Not Just A Potter
by beccasophX
Summary: Lily has always lived a shadow, whether it was her brothers' or her father's. So when she finds herself with the enemies of her brothers, how will they take it? And what about Scorpius Malfoy, who always seems to have an eye on her? Full summary inside..
1. Always a Potter

_SUMMARY: Lily has always lived a shadow, whether it was her brothers' or her father's. So when she finds herself with the enemies of her brothers, how will they take it? And what about Scorpius Malfoy, who always seems to have an eye on her? Lily goes through drastic changes in perspective, and she starts to wonder, are her brothers really the Golden Boys everyone says they are? _

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><p><strong>NOT JUST A POTTER<strong>

**Always a Potter**

Lily Luna Potter always felt overshadowed. Her brother James was the one everyone was proud of, who everyone loved. Her brother Albus was the Quidditch star, Seeker for the Gryffindor team who hardly ever lost a game. Her mother was a professional Quidditch player, captain of her team. Her father was Harry Potter, nothing else need be said.

But Lily's achievements were always compared to her brothers', making them seem smaller. She didn't stand out from them. She wasn't special. She was just plain old Lily Potter, daughter of Harry Potter and sister of James and Albus Potter. There was nothing to her name that was hers.

The only thing different about Lily to her family was the way she dressed, and she'd did it for that exact reason. She wore cropped leather jackets and skinny jeans, military boots and high tops, band t-shirts and studded bracelets. She loved it. It made her stand out from her family when they were all together. Her father hardly approved of it, and that made it all the better. She loved seeing the look on his face when he realised his princess was going out wearing things like that. Lily was eleven, and although she looked older, everyone always treated her as if she was younger. _"Look at little Lily Luna!" _they'd say, because that's what she was. She was always _little Lily Luna_, _Harry Potter's daughter_. She was never just Lily.

When James had been sorted into Gryffindor, she'd wanted to be. She'd been eight at the time. Until these past two years, she'd wanted to be exactly like her eldest brother. She'd wanted to be a Gryffindor, brave and proud. She'd wanted to be smart, and get Os in her OWLs. She'd to be a little clone of them. Until the _Daily Prophet _wanted to do an interview with her family, and the reporter had ignored her. She'd been nine at the time, so she probably wouldn't have said anything interesting anyway, but Albus had only been eleven and yet out of the children he'd spoken the most. Her father had obviously been the one to do most of the talking, and he sat with his arm around his youngest child, his princess, and that's when she realised she didn't want to be just another Potter. She wanted to be recognised for herself, wanted to be liked for her and not her name, and she definitely did not want to rely on her father's fame to get her everywhere just as her brothers did.

The only person who seemed to understand this was Lily's cousin and best friend, Hugo. Hugo was slightly taller than Lily, with curly brown hair that bounced slightly whenever he walked. Hugo's elder sister Rose was forever the favourite of his mother and father, and he resented it. He was just as good, if not better. Lily and Hugo had been best friends since birth, practically. They both weren't exactly fond of Rose either, as she was, well, a snob. She was forever looking down on people.

Lily had always expected to be put into Gryffindor. How could she not, when most of her family was? It was only the year before she went to Hogwarts when she realised it wasn't a certainty that she would be placed in the house she had practically grown up around. Her twin godbrothers, Lorcan and Lysander Scamander, only proved this. Lorcan had been placed into Ravenclaw, while Lysander had been sorted into Gryffindor. So when the time came around for her to make her Hogwarts debut, she was beyond nervous. She was terrified.

"Lil, you better be in Gryffindor!" Albus exclaimed as the family made their way to King's Cross Station.

"Yeah, we have the best part– grades." James corrected himself after a sharp look from his mother. Lily giggled at his failed attempt at covering up that he went to pretty much all the 'wild Gryffindor parties'. Lily knew for a fact that he'd helped organise some of them, him being a Potter after all.

"Er, yeah, our _grades _are wild!" Albus winked at his baby sister. She smiled as her brother's went on about how amazing Gryffindor was, but inside she was worried she'd never experience any of those things. What if she was placed in Hufflepuff? Her brothers would never stop teasing her. What if she was placed in Ravenclaw? Her brothers would go on and on about how she was a bookworm who didn't have any fun. What if she was placed in Slytherin? Lily shuddered; she couldn't bear to think about what would happen if she was placed in the house her brothers despised.

At last they arrived at the station to find her aunt, uncle, Rose and Hugo already waiting for them on the platform.

"Ron? I almost didn't recognise you; you're early!" Her father joked towards his best friend.

"'Mione was moaning about how we're always late so she made sure that we were at least ten minutes early." Lily's uncle Ron grumbled, giving his wife a playful look. "And look at little Lily Luna!" Lily rolled her eyes at the statement that everyone said. What shocked her most about it is that no one else seemed to notice that it was used by everyone. "My, haven't you grown!"

"I haven't grown at all since I was about three, I swear." Lily said, grimacing jokingly at her uncle.

"Nonsense, I only saw you last month and since then you've grown into a skyscraper!" Ron exclaimed, causing Lily to roll her eyes once again. He pulled her in for a hug which she happily returned. As soon as he let go, she walked over to Hugo, who was sat against the wall of the platform, evidently bored out of his mind. Immediately, they started discussing Hogwarts. Then, finally, once Lily's mother was happy that they all had everything and had given James his usual "I don't want to be called down there for anything this year" speech that he always ignored, it was time to say goodbye and board the train.

"Bye daddy, I love you." Lily said, giving her father a long hug. She looked sideways and saw Hugo was doing the same to his mother.

"I love you too, princess. Remember, get good grades, stay out of trouble, and try and be a good influence on your brothers." He pleaded jokingly, pressing his lips to the top of Lily's head. She moved over to her mother, giving her an equally long hug. She said goodbye and waited for Hugo to do the same before boarding the train. Hugo had just finished saying goodbye to his mother and now he moved over to his father. For a moment, Hugo looked uncomfortable, before eventually nodding to his father. He immediately walked over to Lily and they both got on the train together.

When they'd found a compartment and sat down, Lily began to speak again.

"What was that about? With your dad, I mean." She asked tentatively, noticing the blank expression on her best friend's earlier happy face.

"Dad and I sort of got into an argument and we haven't really made up yet. It's just a bit awkward between us now." Hugo shifted uncomfortably.

"What were you arguing about?" Lily asked, trying not to sound as if she was prying.

"How he loves Rose more than me. The usual." Hugo tried to shrug it off but Lily could see how much it bothered him. But, knowing her best friend, she could see how he didn't want to talk about it anymore, and didn't pursue the topic.

"So how excited are you?" She said, changing the topic. Hugo's face immediately split into a wide grin.

"I can't wait. I feel like such a girl." He joked, running a hand through his curly hair.

"I can't either, it's so… exhilarating!" Lily exclaimed, reaching for two of the chocolate frogs she had stowed in her pocket.

"And you can't argue with vocabulary like that." Hugo laughed, taking one of the frogs that Lily was offering him. They were silent for a moment as they ate their chocolate, and then Lily voiced the thought that had been on her mind for the last three months.

"Hugh?" She asked hesitantly.

"Yeah?" He answered through a mouthful of chocolate.

"What if I'm not in Gryffindor?" Lily spoke quietly, almost afraid of the answer.

"Then you won't be in Gryffindor. It's no big deal; they're just houses in a school."

"But this family is like Gryffindor central! What if I'm in Slytherin?" She whispered this last part, but Hugo heard it and she knew he understood.

"Well, yes it is, but even if you are in Slytherin, it's not going to make a difference to us, Lil. You're still the same old 'little Lily Luna'." He joked, knowing how much she despised it when people called her that.

"It'll make a difference to my brothers." She said in a small voice, not wanting him to know how much this part really bothered her.

"Maybe, but there's only a small chance you'll be in that house anyway, Lil. I wouldn't stress about it." He said, and Lily silently thanked him for being the rational one.

* * *

><p>As she walked through it, Lily searched the Great Hall for her brothers. She found them almost immediately, sitting in the centre of the Gryffindor table. Albus gave her a smile and James waved. Lily breathed in deeply, trying to calm her nerves. She felt a hand squeeze her shoulder, and she looked around to smile appreciatively at her best friend. At last, they reached the front of the hall and Professor McGonagall placed a hat on a stool. She heard names called out one by one and held her breath when McGonagall got to the Ps. At last, her name was called.<p>

"Potter, Lily!" As soon as her name left the professor's lips, the hall broke out in whispers. Lily scoffed as she stepped forward; it was like they'd never seen a Potter before.

"C'mon Lil!" She heard James shout at her, earning a laugh. He always made everyone laugh, Lily thought almost enviously. She felt the hat placed upon her head and heard a small voice in her ear.

"Well, well, another member of the Potter-Weasley clan. Now, what do we have here? A desire to prove yourself, to show you're different, that's a very strong thought in your head. Oh, you're smart and brave, and is that some cunning I detect there? Yes it is. I see you're loyal too; you have traits of all the houses. But, you say you want to be different. To be known for yourself? Well then, I think I know exactly where to put you. SLYTHERIN!"

The rest of the hall heard the last word, and everybody froze.

"What?" She heard Albus break the silence. She lifted the hat from her head, and walked over to the now-cheering Slytherin table, trying her hardest not to cry. It wasn't the house itself that she didn't want to be in, it was just that she knew her brothers wouldn't approve. They wouldn't accept it.

"We got a Potter!" Someone chanted as she sat down. She looked up and saw everyone was looking at her, but that wasn't what she cared about. Her eyes found her brothers, who were whispering quickly to each other, no doubt about what they were going to do. Lily looked for the rest of her family. Dominique looked indifferent – the ice queen was always like this – and the rest of her family just looked shocked.

"Weasley, Hugo!" Lily's head snapped back to where the sorting was happening, and saw her best friend looking at her apologetically.

"_There's only a small chance you'll be in that house anyway, Lil." _

She almost rolled her eyes, but her fear was more overpowering. Would these Slytherins accept her? She was the sister of Golden Boys of Gryffindor, after all.

"GRYFFINDOR!"

Lily saw the relief on Hugo's face as he made his way to sit next to his sister. There was now only one girl left to be sorted. She was pretty, with pale skin and coloured black hair. Even from where Lily sat she could see that this girl would be someone she'd get along with.

"Zabini, Elizabeth!"

The girl made her way up to the stool nervously, and for a moment her eyes seemed to lock with Lily's. Lily gave her a small smile, one which the girl returned.

"SLYTHERIN!"

Lily almost breathed a sigh of relief as the girl came to sit next to her at the table. Professor McGonagall said a few words before commencing the feast, and chatter broke out almost immediately. Lily heard snatches of her name here and there, and tears almost sprang to her eyes again but she forced them back down.

"Hi, I'm Effy! You're Lily, right?" The girl said, grinning at Lily.

"Yeah, that's me." Lily said, grinning back.

"I'm guessing that was a bit of a shock for you." Effy laughed, and surprisingly so did Lily.

"Just a little bit, what about you?"

"No, not for me. I was expected to be in Slytherin. My brother is and so were both of my parents, so I sort of had to be."

"Yeah, I know the feeling." Lily was surprised to find herself smirking.

"Oh yeah, your brothers are practically the kings of Gryffindor, right?"

"Yup," Lily said, popping the 'p'. "And the rest of my family pretty much takes up the rest of it." She joked, and Effy grinned.

"Well, at least now you can be yourself." Effy said, leaning over to put some food onto her plate. Lily thought about this. That was the reason the Sorting Hat put her into Slytherin, so she could be herself. But was herself really a Slytherin? Somehow she found herself doubting most of the things her brothers had told her about the house. She shook the thoughts off for the moment, unable to ignore her growling stomach.

"So, it does seem like we have a Potter here. How interesting." A drawling voice made Lily look around. A boy stood in front of her, along with another boy who was the same age and one who seemed to be a first-year too.

"Yes, you do." Lily said, trying not to blush.

"Congratulations on not failing the family!" The other boy spoke, looking at Effy. _Her brother_, Lily thought.

"Thanks for your support, Adrian. I'll sleep easier knowing I pleased you." Effy replied sarcastically.

"What about me? I'm not pleased you're in the same house as me!" The boy who seemed to be Lily's age said, and Lily assumed they knew each other.

"I'm not too happy about that fact either." Effy grumbled, and then noticed Lily laughing. "Oh! Lily, this is Jay Montague, my brother Adrian, and that's Scorpius Malfoy." She pointed to each of them, ending on the taller boy.

"So, Lily, how are your brothers taking the news of their baby sister being a snake?" Scorpius asked, ruffling his white blonde hair.

"Don't remind me, they're probably going to complain to McGonagall about it." Lily joked, seemingly surprising Scorpius. Lily always appeared to surprise people with how outgoing she was. She wasn't shy in the least, although that was what people usually expected from her. She was just little Lily Luna, after all.

"Wouldn't put it past the Golden Boys." Scorpius mumbled, and Lily shocked herself by laughing. She fully became aware that she was laughing with Slytherins at a joke aimed at her brothers, but somehow she laughed anyway. It was about time someone realised they weren't perfect, Lily thought secretly.

The rest of the feast was spent with Scorpius sat on her left and Effy on her right, with Jay and Adrian in front of her. Scorpius and Adrian were telling them about secret passageways, about Hogsmeade, and about Hogwarts itself. Then, McGonagall rose to the Head's podium, and everyone quickly went silent.

"Good evening to you all. To our new students, welcome! And to our old students, welcome back!" She spoke sharply, but not unkindly. She spent the rest of the time talking about not misbehaving and other things along those lines, and Lily quickly tuned out. Eventually, she heard movement and she looked up to find McGonagall's speech over and people filing out of the whole on the way to the common rooms. Lily walked with Effy towards the other first-years, where the Slytherin prefects were showing them to the Slytherin common room.

Lily and Effy followed the others as they were led down lots of stairs towards the dungeons, and eventually outside a wall.

"Okay, first-years, this is our common room. The password is 'serpent'. The password will change sometime in the upcoming months but you will be notified of its change. Any questions? No? Okay, good. Follow me." The boy prefect led them through a door that had appeared when the password had been said, and into the common room.

The room itself was covered in green, black, and silver. Lily couldn't help but marvel at the exquisiteness of the room.

"Girls dormitories are to the right, boys to the left." The girl prefect said some other things as well, but Lily tuned it out and looked around the room. Her eyes locked with none other than Scorpius Malfoy, who gave her a smile. Apparently he and Adrian had come straight here instead of wandering around the castle. Lily smiled back, again willing herself not to blush.

Eventually, the group of first-years was allowed to do what they wanted, so she and Effy went up to their dormitory to explore the room. They soon realised there really wasn't much to explore up there, and made their way down the stairs once again to the common room.

"Hey Lily, what's your nickname?" A voice drawled behind her. She turned to face Scorpius.

"I don't have one." Lily replied. "Why?"

"He gives them to everyone." A girl who looked to be Scorpius' age said to her, rolling her eyes. "I'm Alice, by the way. Alice Goyle." The surname seemed familiar to Lily, but she couldn't remember where from. She was pretty, with blonde hair that fell to her waist and curled at the ends.

"Yeah, so I need one for you." Scorpius said, and Lily shrugged. "What's your middle name?" He asked finally.

"Luna."

"Lily Luna. I like it." He smiled at her, and this time she did blush. "LilyLu. That works."

"I like it." Lily said, happily agreeing to it.

"Well then, LilyLu," Scorpius said, mock importantly, "It is my pleasure to welcome you to Slytherin!"

Lily laughed along with the others, finally feeling… accepted.

* * *

><p>When Lily and Effy finally made their way up to their dorm room, they found two other girls in there. They both looked around and smiled when they entered.<p>

"Hi, I'm Grace! This is Paige." One of the girls said. She had tanned skin, with freckles covering her nose, and straight, light brown hair. The other girl, Paige, smiled too. She was the complete opposite. She had blonde hair and pale skin, with piercing blue eyes that lit up when she smiled.

"Hi, I'm Lily."

"And I'm Effy." The other girls replied, each of them flopping down on their beds. All four of the girls talked for a while before going to sleep. Lily was just about to when she thought about her parents. Albus or James had probably already told them that she was in Slytherin, but she decided to write to them telling them, just in case her brothers had put a spin on it.

_Mum and Dad,_

_I got sorted into Slytherin. Don't be mad. Anyway I figured that even if Albus or James had written to you and told you, they might say that I demanded to be in it or something. But in all honesty, I like it here. Everyone is really nice. I'll write to you soon,_

_Love,_

_Lily._

Pleased with her letter, she folded it up and tied it to her owl, Remus. She opened the window and let him out, and watched him soar through the sky on the way to her parents. Lily sighed.

It was going to be a long day tomorrow.

**A/N**

**Aaah the first chapter! I know this was a bit boring, but it is the first chapter and those are always boring. Anyway, can't really be bothered to put a long a/n.**

**Please review!**

**thanks guys,**

**beccasophX**


	2. Rejection Of The Worst Nature

_SUMMARY: Lily has always lived a shadow, whether it was her brothers' or her father's. So when she finds herself with the enemies of her brothers, how will they take it? And what about Scorpius Malfoy, who always seems to have an eye on her? Lily goes through drastic changes in perspective, and she starts to wonder, are her brothers really the Golden Boys everyone says they are?_

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><p><strong>NOT JUST A POTTER<strong>

**Rejection of the Worst Nature**

Two weeks later, Lily woke in her dorm to find Remus next to her, a letter attached to his leg. As soon as she awoke properly, she untied it.

_Lily,_

_Yes, Albus and James did write to us saying that you'd been Sorted into Slytherin._

_Of course we're not angry with you, princess, how could we be? Albus was partly named after a Slytherin and that man was one of the greatest men I've ever met. I know you're going to brilliant, princess. It doesn't matter what house you are in. As long as you are happy, then we are happy._

_Write to us soon, _

_Dad_

Lily could help but feel sad at the letter. Not at the words, but because her brothers didn't feel the same way at all. She sighed to herself, folded up her letter and headed down to the common room. She still had an hour before breakfast and she wasn't bothered about getting dressed yet, so she wandered downstairs in a small pair of shorts and one of her band t-shirts that was slightly too big for her. She swept her red hair into a messy ponytail and entered the common room.

She made her way over to the black piano that stood in the corner of the room. Lily loved to play – she had done since Albus had left for Hogwarts. With him out of the house she'd needed a way to distract herself, and she'd taught herself to play. She sat down in front of the piano, opening the lid and taking in the familiar smell that she loved so. Her fingers tapped the keys in a pattern, and before she knew it she was lost in the music.

"Hey, red!" Lily jumped, hearing a drawling voice. Scorpius Malfoy stood on the other side of the common room, and was now making his way over. "What are you doing up?"

"Woke up early." She shrugged, surprising herself with how comfortable she was around him, even in her pyjamas. He was also in his, wearing grey tracksuit bottoms and a black t-shirt that he'd obviously just pulled over his head. Lily couldn't help but notice the way his muscles jumped through his shirt. "What about you?"

"I'm always down here at this time." Scorpius shrugged back, flopping down on the black leather sofa. "You play?" He nodded towards the piano.

"Yeah, a little bit."

"Sounded like more than a little bit, red." He smiled at her, and Lily blushed. No one called Lily 'LilyLu' now, because even though he himself had started the nickname, Scorpius chose to call her 'red'. Scorpius seemed like the leader around here, just like James and Albus were like the leaders in Gryffindor. Lily couldn't decide whether she liked being called 'red' or not. She'd always wished to have her father's black hair instead; she found it more appealing than her own.

"Scorpius, can I ask you a question?" She said hesitantly. It was something that had been on her mind, and she decided to just ask him.

"Sure." He shrugged.

"Why are you being so nice to me?" As soon as she said it she realised how pathetic she sounded.

"What do you mean? Would you rather me beat you up or something?" Scorpius' brow furrowed as he assumed a puzzled expression.

"No, no, it's just… well… I know you don't really like my brothers, and I thought that 'cause I was a Potter too that you might've, I don't know, not treated me as nice as you have. If that makes any sense." She rolled her eyes at herself.

"Red, you have to remember that your brothers are tools. To me, anyway. And to anyone else in Slytherin. You're not. You're fun." He said after thinking about it for a moment. Lily laughed.

They sat talking for a while until they both knew it was time for them to go back upstairs and get dressed, ready for breakfast. Upstairs, the other girls were just waking up. Effy looked up when Lily walked in, but was evidently too tired to say anything. She groaned while heaving herself out of bed and Lily rolled her eyes at her. The girls dressed quickly dressed into their school robes, and hurried down to the common room. Down there they met Jay, the boy who Lily had met on her first day at the Slytherin table. Lily noticed the way Jay looked at Effy, and it was obvious the way he felt about her. Apparently obvious to everyone but her, as she seemed oblivious to the way his eyes lit up when she looked or spoke to him. Lily made a mental note to question Effy about it later.

Lily and Effy sat down with Scorpius, Adrian, Alice, Paige, Grace, Jay, and their friend Elliot Fowl. Over the last fortnight, Lily had noticed Elliot eyeing her up a lot. It unnerved her slightly, but she could not deny he was attractive. In fact, he was more than attractive. He was hot. Lily had seen lots of girls look at him in the way that he looked at her. He either didn't notice this or chose to ignore it. But he definitely had his eye on Lily, and she wasn't sure how she felt about it.

She looked up from where she sat at the Slytherin table and her eyes found her brothers. They were sat next to each other, as per usual. Suddenly, James turned his head sharply and his eyes locked with Lily's. She stared right back at him, not being able to tear her eyes away. Neither he nor Albus had spoken a word to her since she was sorted into Slytherin. Lily tried to convince herself it was just because they were busy and maybe they hadn't noticed her, but she knew she didn't really believe that. She felt her tears well up in her eyes at the sight of her elder brothers. Why wouldn't they speak to her? She answered the question herself.

Because they thought she was the enemy.

Of course they did. James had always hated Slytherins, and whatever James did Albus did too. They hadn't _done_ anything to her. Nothing like that. They hadn't even acknowledged her existence. That was what bothered Lily. It was like they didn't care about her anymore. They treated her as if they didn't know her. As if as soon as she'd been put into Slytherin, they'd stopped being family and they started to be strangers.

James still stared at her, evidently not being able to look away. Lily thought she saw a flicker of guilt flash in her elder brother's eyes. It was gone in a second, and he turned away from her, his face stony once more. Lily tore her eyes down to her breakfast, suddenly not feeling hungry anymore. Tears clouded her vision, and it took everything she had not to let them fall.

"Lil? What's wrong?" Scorpius asked, his big grey eyes full of concern.

"Nothing." She lied.

* * *

><p>There was one girl at Hogwarts that Lily knew to stay away from. Stella Skeeter. Well, her name was actually Stella Brown, but she went by Stella Skeeter so everyone would recognise who she was. Her mother was Rita Skeeter, who worked for the Daily Prophet. Lily's Aunt Hermione had choked on her drink when it was announced that Rita Skeeter was having a baby.<p>

"What poor man would want to have a child with that old hag?" She'd exclaimed, causing Lily's father and her Uncle Ron to nod in agreement.

Stella Skeeter knew everything about everyone, and she had lots of ways to get dirt on people. She knew who was friends with who, and, more importantly, who _wasn't _friends with who, and anything to do with anyone important got passed on to her mother. Lily's family situation was just the thing Stella would love, so she tried to stay out of the girl's way. Unfortunately, being a Potter wasn't ideal when you were trying to stay unnoticed for a while. Stella had managed to corner Lily just as she was heading down to lunch.

"Lily! I've been dying to meet you!" She exclaimed, her blonde curls bouncing upon her shoulders.

"Er, hi." Lily replied awkwardly.

"So, what's going on with you and your brothers? Is it true you haven't spoken?" She spoke rapidly, diving straight into what she wanted to know.

"Er, I haven't really seen them enough to talk to them…" Lily said, telling Stella the lie that she'd been telling herself.

"You're avoiding each other?"

"No… no, that's not what I meant…"

"Why don't you want to speak to them?"

"I do… that's not… that's not what I mean, we've just all been so–" Lily tried frantically to undo the damage.

"Are you afraid how they'll react?"

"I… what?" Stella's lips curled into a smile, obviously realising how close to home she'd just hit.

"You know, the Golden Boys of Gryffindor's sister gets put into their enemy house with all of their rivals. You've got to be worried what they might think."

"I… I… er… I don't…" Lily stammered, trying to come up with something that didn't confirm it, but her silence established it anyway.

"Do yourself a favour, Skeeter, and fuck off." Scorpius appeared out of nowhere, coming to Lily's defence. Stella looked absolutely terrified at the thought of being on Scorpius' bad side, and scarpered off quickly. Lily smiled at her retreating figure, knowing that Scorpius would never beat up a girl, and would never instruct anyone else to.

"Thanks." Lily grinned at her rescuer.

"No problem, red." He winked at her, making her laugh. People passing them in the hallway threw them confused looks. Lily knew it was strange for Scorpius Malfoy to be hanging out with a first-year, but for her it didn't seem so unusual. She counted Scorpius as one of her best friends, and she knew he thought of her as his little sister. They grinned at each other, making their way down to lunch together.

* * *

><p>"When does Quidditch training start, James?" Lily heard Albus' voice around the corner.<p>

"I think Thomas said tryouts were next week…" James said, and Lily could practically see him shrugging and ruffling his hair. "It doesn't matter; we're still going to crush those snakes." He added, a disgusted tone to his voice that hurt Lily a little more than she thought it would. She took a deep breath and rounded the corner, Effy's arm linked tightly with her own. She intended on walking straight past them, but it seemed they were both coming around the corner at the same time, and Lily and James stumbled into each other.

"Fuck!" Lily heard her eldest brother swear. "Are you–" He stopped, noticing who he'd bumped into. "What do _you _want?" James sneered at her, shocking her. She blinked at him, not knowing what to say. "Well?" He demanded, snarling.

"What are you doing here, Lily?" Albus said quietly.

"I was just going back to my common room." Lily replied in a small voice, not bothering to ask where they were going.

"Right."

"Al, why are you talking to one of _them_?" James sneered.

"James, what are you talking about?" Lily said, her voice louder now.

"She's a snake, Al." He said, refusing to look at her.

"I'm your sister!"

"It's Lily." Albus responded, a look of utter confusion crossing his features.

"It's a Slytherin." James snarled.

"I don't get it." Albus threw his hands up in perplexity, shaking his head.

"Yeah, neither do I!" Lily practically yelled, "I'm your _sister_! What's wrong with you? I haven't changed! I'm still Lily! You're going to start hating me just because I'm in a different house to you? Wow, James, pathetic much?"

"See! You're already changing!"

"Really? Because to me it seems like you're the one who's changed, James. I haven't done anything except get sorted into a house, and you've turned on me. Brilliant, James, way to show the family love." Lily's voice cracked and she bit back the tears that were clouding her vision.

"You're already different! You've been with _them_," James threw a nasty look at Effy, "for just two weeks and you're already acting like one of them!"

"I'm not _acting _like anything! I'm just being me. My friends can accept that, why can't you? You're supposed to be my brother!"

"This isn't how you're supposed to be!"

"How am I supposed to be then, James? Am I supposed to be hanging on your every word like your so-called friends? Or should I call them your fan club? Am I supposed to pretend to be someone I'm not just to fit in with you? Who am I supposed to be?"

"You're supposed to be a Gryffindor!" He blurted out. "And now you've disappointed everyone." His voice was dangerously low. "Even your own father is disappointed in you. You've shamed your entire family."

Lily couldn't stop the tears now. They rolled down her cheeks rapidly, and her chest tightened. She took a deep breath. "You know what? I'm sorry you can't accept me, and I'm sorry that it has to be this way. But I'm not and I will never be sorry for being myself." She barged past her brothers, dragging Effy with her.

They walked in silence back to the common room, Effy's arm around Lily's shoulders. They entered the room and headed straight to the chairs by the fire. Effy let go of her and Lily huddled up in the armchair, bringing her knees up to her chin and rocking back and forth. Lily felt a warm weight on her shoulders and knew who it was almost immediately. She buried her head into Scorpius' chest and sobbed.

"It's okay, Lil." He whispered to her, pulling her closer towards him. "It's all going to be okay."

He wrapped his strong arms around her small frame as her body shook.

"I believe you."

**AUTHOR'S NOTE**

**Okay, so I've been writing this for the past five days. I've rewritten it like fifteen times in that time, but I've finally written it like this. I'm not sure whether you'll like this one, because it's just a bit of a filler to establish the James/Lily/Albus thing and to see how the Scorpius/Lily relationship is at the moment.**

**Please review!**

**thanks guys,**

**beccasophX**


	3. Family Pride

_SUMMARY: Lily has always lived a shadow, whether it was her brothers' or her father's. So when she finds herself with the enemies of her brothers, how will they take it? And what about Scorpius Malfoy, who always seems to have an eye on her? Lily goes through drastic changes in perspective, and she starts to wonder, are her brothers really the Golden Boys everyone says they are?_

* * *

><p><strong>NOT JUST A POTTER<strong>

**Family Pride**

Lily walked around school with puffy red eyes for the next three days. She couldn't stop thinking about what James had said. Had she really shamed her family? Was she really just another Slytherin to him? Was that how they all felt? Questions ran through her mind too quickly for her to process them properly. She still hadn't fully taken in her encounter with James. Each morning when she woke up she childishly hoped that it was all a dream. The James _she _knew wouldn't have said that. The James she loved wouldn't have said that. The James she looked up to, the James she used to want to be, the James who would always look after her. They wouldn't have done that.

So who was this?

Albus was… different. He wasn't acting like James. But he wasn't acting like Albus. Not the Albus Lily knew. He didn't speak to her at all, and he avoided her gaze even when she knew he knew she was looking at him. Albus was always the loudest one, so this was shocking to pretty much everyone; Scorpius probably the most.

"I didn't know he _could_ shut up…" He'd mumbled, grinning, as they'd all sat around in the common room. Lily had noticed Elliot eyeing her up again and it sent a shiver down her spine and she fought the urge to smile under his gaze.

Lily often wondered why the third-years hung around with the first-years, but she thought it was mainly because Adrian was Effy's brother, and he was really protective over her. He was the older brother Lily wanted. Effy was a bit annoyed with it actually; she kept telling him how she was sick of him always being around, which he always ignored – although Effy'd stopped saying it quite so often when Lily was around. Lily liked Adrian, he never failed to make anyone laugh, but she could see how Effy would be sick of him. He did always seem to be looking over her shoulder.

Tears seemed to always spring to Lily's eyes at even the mention of her brothers, meaning that around her the group didn't talk about them much; but Lily knew they talked about them when she wasn't around. It almost made her smile to think that her friends were that worried about her. Lily kept her head held high anyway. _I am not weak_, she told herself. _I am not weak, so I'll just act like it doesn't bother me. It was only a fight. Mine and James' fights never last long_.

She constantly told herself this as the days went on. _Mine and James' fights never last long_.

She hoped.

* * *

><p>"Come on, Zabini, please help me!"<p>

"Montague, I have my own homework, you know."

"Yeah but you'll finish yours easy. I won't!"

"Yeah but that's because you're retarded."

"Oh, ha-ha. Very funny, Zabini."

"I thought so."

Lily shook her head laughingly at her two best friends. They were always like this, and it never failed to make her giggle. They didn't mean anything by the comments; everyone knew that, it was just banter between them. Lily knew how Jay felt about Effy anyway. He hadn't said anything, and she hadn't spoken to him about it, but the feelings were obvious. The way he looked at her… it was adorable. Lily had to resist the urge to say "Aw!" and make a heart with her hands every time they were together.

"Give it here then. I've finished mine." Effy sighed in defeat and Lily laughed. Jay stuck his tongue out at Effy as he passed her his Potions essay.

"You're a lifesaver. Slughorn already hates me enough…" Jay sighed and ruffled his hair.

"Doesn't everyone?" Effy joked, and Lily giggled. Jay tried to force himself to stay expressionless, but he couldn't help but smile at the comment that was so obviously what he would've said if the roles were reversed.

"Bite me." Jay smirked. Lily laughed and rolled her eyes, then went back to trying to finish her Potions essay.

Effy was brilliant at Potions. She was the best in the year, Lily coming in as a close second. Lily was better at DADA – that was her best subject. She knew it would be; how could it not, with the family she came from?

Her father had often told her that his mother, Lily's namesake, was always brilliant at Potions. From the first time he told her this, she wanted to be too. She'd wanted to be exactly like the Lily Potter she'd never know. She couldn't explain why.

Although, Lily liked the idea of not being a Potter sometimes. Being a Potter meant she had to do well at everything, be perfect at everything, be nice to everyone. She liked the thought of being able to be known as who you really were, and not the name you had adopted.

Lily, Effy, and Jay stayed in the common room until eleven forty-five finishing their homework.

"Right guys, I'm gonna go to bed." Jay said, bleary-eyed and slurring his words.

"Yeah, me too. I'm so goddamn tired that Jay is starting to look attractive." Lily joked, laughing as Jay's face turned from beaming to offended as he registered the insult.

"No, I still don't see it." Effy said, jokingly shaking her head.

"Wow, you guys are so funny. It's a wonder how my sides aren't splitting." Jay noted dryly, turning and walking up to his dorm. The girls giggled as they collected their books and headed up the stairs themselves.

Once in their dorm room, they dumped their books and started to change for bed.

"Eff?" Lily said hesitantly, trying to think of a way to phrase her question.

"Yeah?"

"What do you think of Elliot?"

"So hot the boy should wear a warning sign." Effy replied, as serious-faced as she could. Lily laughed as she pulled on her pyjama shirt. "But he's only got eyes for _you_." She said in a mocking tone, rolling her eyes and making Lily blush.

"What do you think I should do?"

"Well, do you like him?"

"I don't know…" Lily said uncertainly, climbing into her bed. "It's like, yeah he's hot, but I don't _know _him that well."

"So get to know him better."

"But I don't know if I want to get to know him better just to go out with him."

"So you don't want to go out with him?"

"I don't know!" Lily wailed, causing Effy to laugh.

"Okay, so just get to know him better and see if you like him, and if you don't then he's still your friend." Effy reasoned.

"When did you get so logical?" Lily narrowed her eyes.

"It's a gift." The other girl joked.

The two girls joked and laughed for a little while longer before they both agreed to go to sleep. Lily closed the hangings around her bed and lay her head down on her pillow. She snuggled safely into her bed and quickly drifted off to sleep.

* * *

><p>When Lily Potter was nine, she realised that she had always wanted to be another member of her family. James, her paternal grandmother, even Albus. It sickened her to think she had grown up not wanting to be herself, and living in the shadow of others. It pained her to think that the girl her family knew her as wasn't really her at all, just a reflection of all of them. She was her daddy's princess. Except <em>she <em>wasn't. Harry Potter's princess was not his daughter, and he never noticed.

Lily couldn't help be like that when she was around them, though. It was how they expected her to be. Not just because that's how she used to act, but because it was almost demanded of her. She was meant to be like them. Always.

So she was.

So she supposed James was almost right in saying she had changed. Except _she _hadn't. Who he thought she was had. She hated James a bit for saying it though. Who was he to tell her who she could or couldn't be? Who was he to tell her who she _was_? James changed more when he got to Hogwarts than she had! Before he'd started, he was just a prankster. He liked to play practical jokes, and he was funny, but he wasn't _mean_. Now she saw a whole different side to him. And she didn't understand it. How could her brother, her big brother, treat her like a stranger? Treat her like... like he treated all the other Slytherins. She expected his behaviour towards her friends, even if she didn't like it, but she hadn't expected it towards _her_. Why was he acting this way?

The other third-years – Adrian, Scorpius, Alice, Izzy, Liam, and Louis – were more annoyed than even Lily when they heard about her brothers.

"What the hell?" Izzy and Alice exclaimed. Izzy was Alice's best friend; she was pretty, with blonde hair that fell into perfect curls and piercing blue eyes that she outlined carefully in black. She was a lot more girly than Alice, but Lily thought their difference to each other was part of what made them so close.

"Twats." Liam and Louis said. They were twins, identical in everything apart from their hair. Well, sort of. Louis always wore a beanie over his, so you could distinguish one twin from the other. It was obvious Alice had her eye on Louis.

"Wankers." Adrian stated matter-of-factly, which even managed to make Lily let out a giggle.

Scorpius just stared daggers at the two boys at the Gryffindor table, not bothering to voice what he thought. It didn't matter, Lily knew what he was thinking anyway and she was sure it was something that included a vast amount of swear-words.

"It wasn't that bad." Lily mumbled, trying to deflect some attention from her. "And it wasn't Albus, really. I mean, he didn't help but he didn't really do anything."

"Yet." All six third-years said in unison. They all looked around at each other, impressed.

"Albus wouldn't do that..." Lily said, but she couldn't help the uncertain tone slipping into her voice.

"Red, you don't know Albus like we do. You know him as your brother; you don't know him as a Gryffindor." Scorpius said, and Lily had to admit it almost made sense. She could tell that when James was shouting at her, Albus was torn. She could see the mental battle in his mind, one part agreeing with James and the other trying to remember that Lily was his sister. "I'm... er... sure he'll come around though..." He added, seeing the look on Lily's face. She hastily rid her face of any sad emotion, and forced a smile. She saw the others look relieved at her grin, but Scorpius knew better. He studied her face carefully for a moment before going back to his food.

* * *

><p>As the first Quidditch match of the season drew nearer, the agitation on Scorpius, Adrian, and Louis' faces grew clearer. It was Slytherin versus Gryffindor, and no one could tell which side wanted to win more. It was a sign of dominance, as was every match they played against each other, but the first match of the season was always more intense. This game ensured the winners were ahead in the table, at least for a while. The match was in a month and a half, and both teams were battling for time for practice.<p>

Lily felt torn. She felt immensely guilty for wanting Slytherin to win the upcoming game, like she was betraying her brothers somehow. _Not that they haven't turned against me..._

Every time she saw Albus she felt a burst of anger explode inside her. She tried to keep the emotion off her face, but she knew it showed. Each time she saw him she was reminded of the fact that he didn't stick up for her. That he refused to talk to her. That he refused to look at her. That she was just another Slytherin to him. It made her blood boil. But not as much as when she saw James. Lily wished _he'd _ignore her. His cold eyes would meet hers in the hallway and he'd snarl at her. One of his friends tripped her up once, and she tried to convince herself that it wasn't on James' orders. But a small voice in her head knew better. The members of the Potter Club don't do anything without James' say-so. Well, or Albus, but Albus hardly ever had a thought that wasn't James' first, so that barely counted.

Lily saw the tension on her brothers' faces as well. They were both on the Quidditch team; Albus as the star Seeker and James as a Chaser. It surprised her slightly when James first became a Chaser. Their mother was a Chaser, yes, but she'd always assumed he'd follow in their father's and grandfather's footsteps and be a Seeker. But Albus took that spot when the time came anyway.

Scorpius played Seeker, too. It was almost fate that they both were. Lily could remember when Albus had spoken about it in passing and Ron had nudged her father and said,

"Just like you and Malfoy." And laughed. Albus had laughed too, although Lily was certain he didn't know what he was laughing at. _Why is he incapable of having his own thoughts? At least I'm my own person._

"Hey, red!" Scorpius' voice snapped her out of her thoughts.

"Yeah?"

"Are you coming down to the pitch to watch training? The rest of the guys are coming." Scorpius gestured behind him, towards the doors that led out of the Great Hall.

"Yeah, sure." Lily shrugged, "I've got nothing better to do, so I might as well watch you fall off your broom." She grinned, and Scorpius couldn't suppress a smirk.

"You just keep waiting for that one, red."

"Oh, I'm counting on it." She laughed, and Scorpius rolled his eyes in an imitation of her. He laughed and then the two of them joined the rest of their friends and headed down to the Quidditch pitch.

Scorpius, Adrian and Louis all made their way onto the pitch while the rest of them headed towards the stands. They waited and watched as sixth-year Thomas Stanway demonstrated a new move he wanted the team to try. Lily recognised it immediately; her brothers used to use it against her when they played against each other with the other cousins in the summer. She didn't know the name, but she knew that both of her brothers knew the move and would know how to use it to their advantage.

"It won't help them." She muttered, not realising she'd spoken aloud.

"What?"

"The move. The Gryffindors will already know it, trust me. It won't help them."

"Hey! Hey Brown!" Alice shouted to Louis. Lily saw Liam and Izzy exchange smirks and she stifled a giggle.

"What?" Louis yelled back.

"The Gryffindorks already know that move! Won't help you! Lily said!"

"Shit!" Louis swore loudly, and called to Stanway to tell him what he'd just been informed of. They all heard Stanway swear louder than Louis had, causing the rest of the team to look up to the stands to see who had been their informant.

"Isn't that Potter's sister?" Lily heard one of them say, although she couldn't remember the boy's name. Cartwright or something like that.

"Yes, that's _Lily_." She heard Adrian reply, and she smiled.

"She could be a spy for them!" The boy said. As soon as the words came out of his mouth, Scorpius, Adrian and Louis all slapped him on the back of his head. Lily laughed along with the rest of her friends.

"Shut the fuck up, Cartwright." Louis said, and Lily felt laughably proud that she knew the boy's name.

"Alright, calm down..." She heard Cartwright reply, rubbing the back of his head with a gloved hand.

The rest of the practice went by without a hitch, as Stanway quickly regrouped and showed the team another move. Lily's friends messed around in the stands as Lily watched the team fly. They were good. Really good. Lily couldn't help notice how much more swift their turns were compared to her brothers'. She felt a small twang of guilt as she thought it, but it was true. Not that her brothers weren't good; no, they were brilliant at Quidditch, but the Slytherins moved so much more fluently through the air.

When the session ended, Scorpius, Adrian and Louis hung around and got permission from Stanway to borrow a few brooms for the rest of the group. Lily was given a Nimbus 2001. An old model, but certainly not a bad one. Lily remembered her Uncle Ron saying something about the broom, but she couldn't recall the wording. She hopped on her broom and soared into the air effortlessly. Effy and Jay were the same, as they'd also grown up in big Quidditch families, but Alice and Izzy got on with less ease. Liam got on quickly and went to hover next to his beanie-wearing brother.

"Come on, red, one lap of the pitch. I'll race you." Scorpius winked at Lily, and she grinned.

"Hmm, I don't know; I don't want to see your pride get hurt too bad by being beaten by a first-year girl." She mocked.

"Let's see how cocky you are when I beat you then." He grinned back, and she got into position next to him so they would start at the same point.

"And... go!" Alice shouted, and in a flash Lily was gone. She sped in front of Scorpius before he even knew what happened, and she heard him laugh behind her. She could hear him coming closer, and she urged her broom faster. She knew he was almost directly behind her when she whizzed past her friends, completing the lap.

She turned her broom around and flew back to her friends, grinning. She saw them cheering and laughed.

"Pfft, I let you win..." Scorpius scoffed jokingly, making the rest of them laugh.

"Lil, where did you learn to fly like that?" Louis asked.

"I'm a Potter," She shrugged, "It's sort of in my blood."

"You're really good. Like exceptionally for a first-year. What position do you play?" Adrian joined in.

"Chaser."

"Brilliant." Scorpius' face cracked into a grin. "Stanway's been dying to get rid of Williams for ages."

"Do you think he'll do it?" Louis asked.

"Obviously. Not only is it an excuse to get rid of Williams but we'll also have a freakin' Potter!" Adrian exclaimed, gesturing his arms wildly for effect.

"Er, can someone please tell me what's happening?" Lily asked uncertainly.

"We're getting Stanway to put you on the team." Scorpius explained matter-of-factly.

"But... but I'm a first year...?"

"It's happened before. Not a big deal." Adrian shrugged. Lily remembered her father telling her he'd been placed in the Gryffindor Quidditch team when he was a first-year, and he'd been the youngest Seeker in a century. _Think of James' face if you become a Chaser before he had._

"All you've got to do is convince Stanway before the next match." Alice said.

"Leave it to me." Scorpius grinned.

* * *

><p>"Done." Scorpius and Adrian flopped down onto the large leather sofa in the common room.<p>

"What did you do?" Izzy groaned jokingly.

"Lily's on the team." Adrian explained. Lily's head snapped up.

"Seriously? Just like that?" She was shocked; that wasn't normal.

"Well, no. You have to go out to a session with Stanway on Wednesday, so he can see how you fly, but if he thinks you're good enough–"

"–Which you are–"

"Then you're in." Adrian continued as if Scorpius hadn't interrupted. Lily felt her face break into a grin. She blushed slightly, but she couldn't stop smiling. She thanked the boys – repeatedly – and went back to her Transfiguration homework, still smiling.

Lily passed Stanway's test easily, and at the end he actually picked her up and hugged her. The rest of the team welcomed her warmly, although it was obvious that a girl had not been on the team for years. Lily couldn't help but feel pride at this; not only had she made the team in her first year – something not even her brothers, Quidditch stars, had done – but she'd also been the first girl good enough to let on the team.

She trained with the rest of the team every week until the match, and sometimes Adrian, Scorpius and Louis took her out to practice as well. She'd been told to keep her appointment to the team a secret to shock people – meaning her brothers – at the match, so she had. She'd written to her mother and father, asking for a broom and explaining the circumstances. She knew they'd be proud; her father had done the same.

They'd sent her a Firebolt 4000, the fastest model yet. She was so stunned when she received it. It wasn't that her parents couldn't afford it, far from it; it was just that she didn't expect a broom this good. The only other person on the team who had the same broom was Scorpius, and of course he'd have the best. Lily couldn't help but smile when she thought of the looks that would appear on Albus and James' faces when they saw her broom.

The match was on the November 13th. Lily knew she was physically ready for it, but she thought nothing could prepare her for seeing her brothers out there. This wasn't just a friendly family game when she was against them, this was the real thing. There was no going back from this one now. James and Albus would never fully forgive her for 'turning against them in their own sport'. She thought about those words. Those words she knew James would say. It made her blood boil. They'd been worse to her now. Albus had even started joining in. They jeered and hissed when she walked past and they tripped her up and 'accidentally' spilled ink on her. They made a point of not lowering their voices when they were talking about her, and news around the castle spread fast about how Albus and James Potter had practically disowned their sister. Every time she saw them she braced herself, and her friends automatically surrounded her so they couldn't get to her. Not that seeing them didn't cloud her eyes with hot tears that threatened to spill over. She thought about their jeering, and their taunting, and their bullying, and that's when Lily knew.

She was going to win.

But even so, on the 13th, Lily made her way down to breakfast with her friends looking noticeably pale and slightly green.

"Don't worry, red, you'll be fine." Adrian winked.

"Yeah, you're even better than dickhead over here." Alice laughed, gesturing towards Scorpius, who didn't bother looking up and just stuck his middle finger up at her. "Charming." Alice noted dryly.

Effy looked at Lily and sighed. "You have to eat something, Lil." Lily nodded but still didn't touch her food; she knew she would have trouble keeping it down.

When breakfast had finished, the group made their way down to the changing rooms. Lily dressed in her Quidditch robes quickly, grateful that all the boys turned away, embarrassed and blushing. _Wow, it has been a long time since they've had a girl in here._ Once they'd all changed into their robes, Stanway sat them down and discussed strategy. Lily knew all this, as he'd gone over it more than a few times, and she found herself – among others – tuning him out.

"Now let's kick some Gryffindork ass!" Lily cheered along with the rest of the team as they all snapped out of their dream-state, vaguely aware that she was cheering for her own brothers' failure.

"The Gryffindor team make their way out onto the pitch!" Lily recognised Ralph Murs, a Ravenclaw third-year, speaking from the commentator's box. "Captain Anthony Thomas! James Potter! Fred Weasley! Rose Weasley! Alex Barrios! Chase Westwick!" Aaaaaand... Albus Potter!" Lily heard Scorpius spit on the ground.

"And the Slytherin team! Captain Tom Stanway! Louis Brown! Adrian Zabini! Oliver Winters! James Butler! Lily Potter! Aaaaaand... Scorpius Malfoy!"

As she flew out onto the pitch, Lily saw the confusion flitting across her brothers' faces and grinned when she saw the shocked expressions they wore when they saw the broom she was riding on. _This is gonna be fun._

Lily scored 6 goals in the first 10 minutes; the Gryffindor team clearly underestimated her. Even James, who'd been playing her for years. Slowly, the points built up. Lily, Adrian, Louis were unstoppable. They worked together like a machine, each of them knowing what the other was going to do before they did it. They intercepted and passed and shot and scored, infuriating the Gryffindors even more with every goal. When Lily fully became aware of the score, it was 250-410 to Slytherin. Even if Albus caught the snitch now, Slytherin would not lose.

Lily felt the corners of her mouth curl into a grin, and she glanced across at the other Chasers. They both grinned back at her and Adrian winked.

"Watch out, red!" Oliver Winters, one of the Beaters, shouted. She just looked around to see what he was shouting about when something hard slammed into her head, sending her flying forwards. Lily felt blood fill her mouth and she felt her hand slip on the broom. She was going to fall. She could feel herself falling but she couldn't stop–

Strong arms caught Lily around her waist and carefully hoisted her back onto her broom. She immediately assumed it was Adrian, and opened her eyes to thank him. When she finally managed to open them, however, she was not greeted with Adrian's mess of dark hair, but instead she saw carefully tousled, white-blonde hair. Scorpius. She grinned at him,

"Shouldn't you be catching the snitch?"

"Meh, you needed my attention more." He grinned lopsidedly. "You okay?"

Lily spat a mouthful of blood to the ground. "All good."

"You sure? Don't want you fainting on the pitch."

"Please," Lily scoffed, "This match isn't going to last much longer." Scorpius laughed and, when he was sure she was steady on her broom, flew back to his position and started searching for the snitch again. Lily flew back into _her _position, and her eyes immediately landed on James – and saw his face. It was half triumphant, half angry. _He told them to aim for me_. She could see it in the glory in his face, and the anger that it didn't knock her off her broom. The anger, of course, was also because Scorpius had helped her. She spat out blood again, her eyes still locked with her eldest brother's, making sure the message was clear. _That is what I think of you_. The glory vanished from James' face and his expression was now pure anger. She resisted the urge to laugh at how pathetic he was, and tuned back into the game.

Louis called her name and quickly passed her the Quaffle, and just like that she was back in the game. Another five minutes passed and Slytherin scored another 5 goals, making the score now 270-460 to Slytherin. Lily smiled to herself; there was no way Gryffindor could catch up now.

"And it looks like Malfoy has seen the snitch!" Murs' voice rang out across the pitch, "Yes, he's definitely seen something Potter hasn't!" Lily whipped her head around and saw that, indeed, Scorpius had taken off, racing around the pitch in pursuit of the tiny golden ball. Albus had taken off straight after him after hearing Murs' commentary, but anyone could see it was pointless. He wasn't going to catch it before Scorpius did, and even if he did it wasn't like Gryffindor would then win.

Without anyone realising it, the rest of the game slowed down slightly; everyone was watching Scorpius and Albus try to catch the snitch. Murs was still commentating on the game, but Lily tuned it out.

"Come on, Scorpius." She muttered under her breath. She could see Albus shouting at Scorpius but his words were drowned out by the roar of the crowd. Then Lily saw Scorpius stretch his hand out, and the crowd cheered even louder.

"And Malfoy has caught the snitch! Slytherin win!" Murs announced. Lily cheered with the rest of her team, and a wide grin had spread on her face. She flew down to the ground and joined the rest of her team. Scorpius was still in the air, holding the snitch. _Show off_, Lily laughed.

Scorpius flew down on the ground, and Lily saw a big smile on his face as well. Then, just as his feet touched the ground, something slammed into the back of his head. People screamed, but Lily could hardly hear it. She looked towards where the Bludger had come from, and she saw Albus holding a Beater's bat. He landed on the ground, almost triumphantly, and Lily's face turned red in anger. She tried to run towards him, but someone was holding her back.

"Careful there, Malfoy," Albus spat, "Don't want to look weak in front of your _snakes_. Oh wait, I bet you're used to that, aren't you?"

Scorpius spat blood out near to Albus' feet. "I'd rather look weak than be pathetic like you."

"Watch what you're saying there, Malfoy. Didn't your _Death Eater _father ever teach you about manners?" Albus smirked, and a collective gasp rang out on the pitch. Scorpius' face drained of its colour.

"At least my father taught me about family pride. Yours seemed to have skipped that lesson." Scorpius said, and Lily was stunned. _Why is he bringing me into this?_

"Shut up, Malfoy!"

"Why? I'm just stating facts."

"Shut the fuck up, Malfoy!"

"That's funny, you don't seem to want to own up to how you've made your sister an outcast in her own family."

"I don't have a sister." Albus spat, his face contorted in anger. Lily heard an intake of breath across the pitch, but she barely registered it. Hot tears were spilling from her eyes, and she felt like she couldn't breathe. She needed to go; she needed to get out of there. She made to run but her legs wouldn't move. She struggled for breath, tears falling rapidly. She felt her knees buckle and she hit the ground.

The last thing saw was Scorpius' fist connecting with Albus' face – then everything went black.

**A/N**

**I know it's been a while since I've updated, but in my defence I do have a head injury..:L but anyway, I've made you a long chapter just to make up for it. **

**Soooo? What did you think? What do you think of Albus?**

**Reviews make Hugo confront Lily!**

**thanks guys!**

**beccasophX**


	4. A Change in Relationships

_SUMMARY: Lily has always lived a shadow, whether it was her brothers' or her father's. So when she finds herself with the enemies of her brothers, how will they take it? And what about Scorpius Malfoy, who always seems to have an eye on her? Lily goes through drastic changes in perspective, and she starts to wonder, are her brothers really the Golden Boys everyone says they are?_

* * *

><p><strong>NOT JUST A POTTER<strong>

**A Change in Relationships**

"–That prat! I'll get him for this you know!–"

"–Will she be okay?–"

"–At least she's in better shape than Scorpius–"

"–Wankers!–"

Lily woke to seven voices around her. She heard their talk but didn't process the words. She tried to sit up and black spots danced in front of her eyes.

"–She's awake!–"

"–Thank fuck–"

"Guys can you just shut the hell up for a minute?" Lily heard her own voice as she registered her surroundings. She was in the hospital wing. Effy, Jay, Adrian, Alice, Izzy, Louis, and Liam stood around her, their eyes wide. "Where's Scorpius?" She asked, voicing the first thought that came to her mind. She made to sit up but her head was too heavy on her pillow.

"I'm here." A voice sounded from her right, and she carefully turned her head to see. Lily let out an involuntary gasp; Scorpius was lying in the bed next to her, his eye was blackened and his hair was sticky with something that looked a hell of a lot like blood. His cheek bore a large bruise and his bottom lip was cut and swollen.

"Wha– What happened to you?" As soon as Lily said it, she remembered.

"_I don't have a sister."_

Lily felt her vision clouding and she turned away from Scorpius, not wanting him to see the tears that threatened to spill over. In a second she felt an arm curl around her shoulders.

"It's okay, red, don't worry about it." She looked up and saw Scorpius smiling down at her. She tried to smile back weakly, but she lost all the concentration she had on not crying. Tears rolled down her cheeks rapidly, and she felt Scorpius move in closer to her. She buried her head in his chest as she sobbed, only vaguely aware that the others were still in the room. She felt Scorpius' hand in her hair as he spoke. "He's just being more of a twat than usual, he'll come around eventually."

"Wait." Lily pulled back from Scorpius, wiping her eyes on her sleeves. "If you're here because you had a fight with him, where's he?"

"He decided to 'go back to lessons because he didn't want to ruin his education'," Scorpius replied, "Basically, he wanted to show off his battle scars to everyone. Which is stupid, because he lost."

"He lost big time." Adrian agreed, and the others around him nodded, "He was practically crying for his daddy to save him after Scorp punched him."

"Every time anything goes wrong for him he either runs for dad or James. It's his thing."

Madam Pomfrey came bustling in soon after, telling Lily that she could go to lesson if she felt okay. Scorpius made to follow them, but the matron stopped him with a stern warning. He grumbled back to his bed and the others laughed.

"You better come visit me!" He called as they walked out of the hospital wing. Lily turned her head around to him, while all the others ignored him.

"Thank you." She mouthed to him, and he grinned.

"Anytime." He mouthed back, and she headed to where her friends now were.

Lily turned to Effy and Jay, "So, what have we got?"

"Potions and then Herbology, I think." Jay groaned.

"Both with the Gryffindorks. Great." Lily said sarcastically, grinning at her two best friends.

As they walked, Lily noticed people staring at her, whispering and pointing.

"–That's the Potter kid!–"

"–I heard she was disowned–"

"–Scorpius Malfoy punched her brother for her–"

"–Have you seen Albus Potter's scars?–"

"–Oh he's so brave!–"

Some people shot her dirty looks, obviously thinking that she'd _made _Scorpius fight Albus. She couldn't help but giggle at how some students said Scorpius and Albus' names, though; it was like they were royalty. Which she supposed they kind of were; James and Albus were the kings of Gryffindor, and Scorpius was the Slytherin Prince. Lily had even heard some people call him that – the girls mostly.

Lily kept her head down as she walked, noticing Effy and Jay move closer to her, as though they could protect her from the stares. Effy tried to reassure her that the stares would go away eventually. Lily tried to let herself believe it, and she almost did. Until she, Effy, and Jay walked into the dungeons, voices stopped at once and every eye was turned onto Lily. She felt her cheeks heat up under their gaze as Effy and Jay led her to their table.

The lesson went without incident, although Lily caught a few whispers here and there about her, Scorpius, and Albus. She also noticed Hugo looking at her from the other side of the room where he was sitting with the Gryffindorks. Lily couldn't help but think his Gryffindor friends were dull. She knew she was probably being prejudiced, but they seemed so boring to her. The Slytherins knew how to have fun and were always cracking jokes, while the Gryffindors seemed to think that doing their homework and playing Quidditch were the only fun things out there. Lily couldn't understand how Hugo could be around them; he was never one for either of those. Those were things Rose did. Hugo didn't want to be anything like Rose. He'd always been proud to be different, just like Lily, which is part of what made them so close. Lily secretly thought that Hugo would get on so much better with her Slytherin friends, and that he should meet them. Suddenly, it hit her that she hadn't spoken to him since they were sorted – almost two months ago. She hadn't spoken to her best friend in two months? And she hadn't noticed? She sent him a smile that he happily returned, and this simple gesture was what made Lily able to ignore the stares from her classmates.

As they filed out of the dungeon, Hugo pulled her aside.

"Lil, can I talk to you for a second?"

"Yeah, of course." Lily smiled, but Hugo sent a pointed look over her shoulder towards where Effy and Jay were standing. "Er, guys? Go on ahead, I'll catch up." Jay called something about not being late for Herbology, and started to walk away with Effy.

"So, er, how have you been?" Hugo asked awkwardly, starting to walk towards the greenhouses.

"Hugh, I'm fairly certain you didn't call me over just to ask me that."

"Yeah, you're right. I didn't. I called you over to tell you that I miss you."

"I miss you too. You're the expert on family crises. I really could've used your help these past two months."

"Yeah, but Rose and I have never really been like this. She's never practically disowned me or anything like that." Hugo shrugged. He quickly noticed the tears in Lily's eyes, "Albus has always been a bit of a prick though, and you know that. In fact, you're the one to say that most of the time." He said, and she let out a giggle.

"So how's Gryffindor, anyway?" She grinned at him, trying to steer away from the subject. He took the hint and followed suit.

"Merlin, you don't understand how boring they are!" Hugo exclaimed, "I thought this would be a way to get _away _from Rose, and instead I get to live with clones of her! It's a nightmare, honestly! A lot of the time I'm wishing I was sorted in Slytherin, they seem so much more fun. How's it going there?"

"Pretty good, actually. No, more than that. It's like a big family, which is good because I've been practically disowned from mine." She grinned, trying to prove that she could laugh about the matter. "I keep thinking that you'd prefer being in Slytherin with me, they're your sort of lot."

"And yours, apparently. James keeps getting a little worked up that 'Scorpius Malfoy is hitting on you'," Hugo said pointedly.

"'Scorpius Malfoy is hitting on me'? What? No, that's not how it is at all!" Lily exclaimed, while her stomach twisted unexpectedly.

"Really, because that's how it looks. Don't you know who he is?"

"Er, one of my best friends?" Lily could feel her temper rising as her voice got louder.

"You've heard my da– your dad talk about his father, doesn't it bother you?" Hugo fumbled over his words, but not efficiently enough for Lily not to notice how he avoided talking about his father.

"I've never met his father, so I'm not going to judge him on what someone else has said about him!"

"And you've heard your brothers talk about Scorpius and what _he's _done, doesn't that bother you?"

"No, because I _know _Scorpius. He's not anything like how Albus and James have described him! He's funny and nice and always up for a laugh, and they're trying to convince everyone they're saints while he's looking after the sister they've disowned!" Lily's couldn't stop her voice from cracking as she spoke.

There was a minute of silence before Hugo spoke again, "I'm sorry, Lil. I didn't mean to upset you. I wasn't thinking. I've never met Scorpius so how would I know what he's like? I shouldn't have said anything. I'm really sorry. I sounded like _Rose_." Hugo added in a disgusted tone. "Sorry, Lil."

"No, it's okay. I shouldn't have blown up at you. Are we still good, then?"

"Only as long as you promise not to leave me in the clutches of the Gryffindors for too long a time." Hugo grinned, making Lily laugh.

"I promise." She grinned.

Hugo sat with Lily, Effy, and Jay once they got into the greenhouses, and Lily could see him fighting the urge to laugh at the looks on his fellow Gryffindors' faces. Even Professor Longbottom was looking at him, his mouth hanging slightly open in surprise. He recovered himself quickly, and handed out instructions to the pupils.

"Oi! Weasley!" Ace McLaggen 'whispered' to Hugo.

"What?" Hugo's voice was already thick with boredom.

"Why are you sitting with... _them_?" Ace threw a look of disdain towards Lily, Effy, and Jay.

"_She _is my cousin and best friend, dickwad. And _they _are her other best friends." Hugo rolled his eyes. "Oh, yea, I'm Hugo, by the way." He added to Effy and Jay, grinning at them. They each returned the smile happily.

"Hey, I'm Effy," The black-haired girl smiled, her voice bright and cheery. Lily rolled her eyes at her.

"Jay," nodded Jay, in the same tone of voice Hugo used. "Piss off, McLaggen." He added towards Ace.

"What kind of name is 'Ace', anyway?" Effy mocked.

"What kind of name is 'Effy'?" Ace shot back.

"It's better than yours." Jay scoffed, and Lily noticed how he quickly came to Effy's defence and smiled.

"Wow, kiss more ass, Montague."

"At least I can get some."

"Wow, the testosterone in here is suffocating." Lily noted sarcastically. Effy met Lily's gaze and rolled her eyes.

The rest of the lesson went off without incident, although the stares from the Gryffindors never stopped. Hugo and Jay got on instantly with Jay stating, "Thank Merlin you're here, I was stuck with these two talking about girl shit!" and Hugo replying, "I know exactly what you mean, just be thankful you're not related" with an added wink at Lily.

At lunch, Hugo hesitated before sitting down at the Slytherin table with the other three eleven-year-olds, but sat down eventually. There were a few murmurs and stares at first, but then Scorpius came and threw himself down at the table next to Hugo, introducing himself and piling his plate high with food. After it was established that the leader of Slytherin was fine with a Gryffindor and a Weasley sitting with them, the whispers stopped quickly. From the Slytherin table, at least. Lily saw the rest of her family shoot horrified looks toward Hugo – along with most of Gryffindor.

Hugo's eyes strayed toward Rose, who looked like she was refusing to look his way. Then, suddenly, she turned her head, her sharp gaze boring into Hugo. His face hardened, but amusement danced in his eyes. Lily almost laughed at how shocked Rose looked; her mouth hung slightly open, gaping at her younger brother sitting with Slytherins. Hugo sent her a huge smile and turned to face Scorpius and began talking, making Rose's eyes bulge out of her head. Scorpius glanced slightly at Rose, and smiled at Hugo. He threw his arm around the younger boy's shoulders, grinning enthusiastically. Lily giggled, knowing that Hugo would definitely like Scorpius now.

...

As Christmas drew nearer, Hugo became a part of the Slytherin family. He hung out with Lily and her friends in the Slytherin Common Room, and almost everyone in there accepted the fact that he was there, even smiling at him when they passed him in the hallways. Lily saw the confusion on some people's faces as they took in his Gryffindor robes, and she caught catches of whispers of 'Slytherin's Weasley' almost as much as she heard 'Slytherin's Potter'.

Having Hugo by her side made the constant glares from her brothers more bearable, but Lily was dreading having to leave for the Christmas holidays. Scorpius seemed to realise this, and kept trying to cheer her up by talking about the upcoming Quidditch matches. He knew it wasn't working, but he was doing it to make her laugh, which he succeeded in.

Lily and Scorpius were walking to dinner when they spotted the Potter boys, and immediately Lily stiffened. Each of them had stopped, with the three boys staring daggers at each other. Then Scorpius' face brightened, and a large grin spread across his face.

"Hey, Lil, I just remembered! My parents throw this stupid Christmas dinner thing every year, and we're all going. You in?" He grinned.

"Sure." Lily smiled back, trying not to laugh at the looks on her brothers' faces.

"Awesome. Can't wait." He winked, throwing an arm around her shoulders and continuing their walk. "Bye boys." He raised his eyebrows at Albus and James and smirked at their open-mouthed expressions.

They rounded the corner and Lily burst into fits of giggles, Scorpius laughing along with her.

"Merlin, did you see their faces?" Lily laughed, and Scorpius grinned.

"Seriously though, you're coming. I don't think I can bear another year without someone to make it more fun."

Lily chuckled, "Anything to get away from my brothers. Something tells me this Christmas break is not going to be a picnic." She said dryly.

"Well, I know for a fact that this year will be better. You being there might take my mind of having to dress _nice_." Scorpius noted in distaste.

"Nice?"

"Oh yeah. You're gonna have to wear a dress or something."

"What?" Lily's eyes widened in horror. "I don't... er... I can't... I don't wear dresses..." Much to her annoyance, Scorpius let out a laugh. "Don't laugh at me!"

"Relax, you'll look gorgeous, as per usual." Suddenly, Lily began to get hotter, and she felt herself blush.

"You... er... You mean that?"

"Yeah... I mean... you always look... gorgeous..." Scorpius cleared his throat, and Lily saw a faint pink flush on his usually pale cheeks. Lily became conscious of Scorpius' arm still draped around her shoulders, and all too aware of how little space there was between them. He seemed to become aware of it too, and Lily saw him go to take his arm away. A look flitted across Scorpius' face, and instead of removing his arm he held her tighter, and they continued the walk to the Great Hall in silence, the blush never leaving Lily's cheeks.

She didn't eat much for dinner that night, and she went up to bed almost immediately after entering the common room. She lay awake in her dormitory for long after the other girls fell asleep, not able to keep her thoughts away from the tall, blonde-haired boy. What was it that she felt when he held her? Why did she blush? Why did her heart start pounding in her chest when he called her gorgeous?

_Oh Merlin_, she thought, _I have a crush on Scorpius._

**A/N**

**I AM SO SORRY. It's been like over a month since I last updated, and sorry if it seems rushed at the end. I assure you it's not, but I guess you can't tell right now:S. ****Also, I think part of the reason why I haven't updated is my latest obsession - The Vampire Diaries. Blame my sister, she's the one who's got me into it. But it's brilliant. And I am in love with it. So sorry:L**

**But anyway, enough with that, what did you think?**

**Please review!**

**thanks guys!**

**beccasophX**


	5. You Don't Deserve Me

_SUMMARY: Lily has always lived a shadow, whether it was her brothers' or her father's. So when she finds herself with the enemies of her brothers, how will they take it? And what about Scorpius Malfoy, who always seems to have an eye on her? Lily goes through drastic changes in perspective, and she starts to wonder, are her brothers really the Golden Boys everyone says they are?_

* * *

><p><strong>NOT JUST A POTTER<strong>

**You Don't Deserve Me**

At first, Lily had no idea how to act around Scorpius. She felt herself trying to avoid him, and she hated it. But the next few weeks passed, and she got back into her old routine of being around him. She realised didn't feel anything like that for him; he was just a close friend. One of her best friends. He was like a brother to her, and she knew he felt the same. She wouldn't deny that he was attractive. There would be no point – she knew he was. With his piercing grey eyes and the white blonde hair that fell into his eyes, as well as his lean, muscular body, he had every girl at Hogwarts pining after him. But to Lily, he was the brother she used to have.

It was time for Christmas break, and Lily was not happy to be leaving. She didn't want to see her brothers. She didn't want to hear their arrogant voices everywhere she turned. But she had to go. Not just because her parents would definitely not allow her to stay, but because of Teddy. He had written to Lily, telling her he had big news that he would share with everyone at Christmas. She couldn't miss him telling the news. And there was Scorpius' Christmas party to go to. She had to.

On the morning of the day they were meant to leave, Lily had woken up earlier than usual. She tried going back to sleep, but she found that she was already wide awake. So instead, she made her way down to the common room. Immediately, her eyes were drawn to the big piano in the corner of the room. She hesitated before walking over to it and sitting down. She took in the musty scent and closed her eyes. She began to play a muggle song she'd heard before coming to Hogwarts, and she found herself singing along to it.

_I should go_

_Before my will gets any weaker_

_And my eyes begin to linger_

_Longer than they should_

_I should go_

_Before I lose my sense of reason_

_And this hour holds more meaning_

_Than it ever could_

_I should go_

She was too wrapped up in the music to notice Scorpius coming downstairs. He sat down on the other side of the room, keeping out of her sight, listening to her sing. He was transfixed by the sound; it was so pure, so beautiful. When she had finished, he found himself clapping. Lily looked up quickly, startled.

"Scorpius! What are you doing here?" Her face had turned a deep shade of red.

"Listening to you, red." Scorpius winked, and she blushed even more, "You're really good, you know that?"

"Shut up..." Lily mumbled, looking down.

"No, seriously. How did I not know you were that good?"

"Because I'm not."

"Yes you are, you're amazing."

"Shut up, Scorpius." She said, almost warningly.

"But why?"

"Because I'm not... I just... Just shut up, okay?"

"I don't understand. You have an amazing voice. Why aren't you singing all the time?"

"Shut up."

"I'm sorry, but I really don't understand!" Scorpius' voice cracked with exasperation.

"Shut up, Scorpius." Lily started to raise her voice.

"But _why_?"

"Because I'm not good enough!" Lily practically screamed. "I will _never _be good enough! Everything I do isn't _Potter _enough! You don't get it, Scorpius! If I'm good at things, my brothers have to be good at things. And if they're not, then they make fun of me for it. They call me a show-off, or they say that _Potters don't do that_. Anything I do gets compared to what they do! I will never be able to step out of their shadow! They make sure of that! Nothing I do will _ever _be good enough for them."

She was almost crying now. She looked up into Scorpius' eyes, and he saw that she really believed that. Scorpius studied her hard for a moment, realising that sat in front of him was this amazingly talented girl who had no idea of how great she was. Her brothers had seen to that. They'd knocked every bit of confidence from her, killed any ounce of self-esteem she had left. Anger boiled up inside him, his hatred towards the Potter brothers rising with every second. They did this to their little sister. Their little sister who loved them, looked up to them, and cared for them. They stripped away at her, turning her into an insecure, frightened, little girl. But Scorpius knew Lily was much more than that.

"Lily," Scorpius spoke calmly in spite of the thoughts running through his mind, "I'm going to say this, and I need you to listen. And every time you feel like you're not good enough, I want you to remember this." Lily nodded. "They do not deserve you."

"But–"

"Never forget that. They do not deserve you. You are an amazingly talented, funny, smart girl and if they can't see that, then they don't deserve to. Remember that for me." And with that, Scorpius got up and walked back upstairs.

Lily sat where she was for a few more minutes, frozen. She'd never told anyone how she'd felt about that; instead she buried those feelings, telling herself that it didn't matter. She felt weak for letting it slip out. She hadn't wanted anyone to know how she'd felt for eleven years. She hadn't had anyone to talk to about it, anyway. And now she did. She felt grateful for Scorpius.

He made her feel safe.

* * *

><p>Scorpius didn't mention anything about what she'd said when they boarded the train. Instead, he acted like it had never happened. Lily was grateful for that; she didn't want the others to know about her outburst. She didn't want anyone to know.<p>

The train ride home was fun; all 10 of their group managed to squeeze into one compartment. Hugo sat with Jay on the floor, with Effy playing with Hugo's curls. Alice and Louis sat next to each other, a fact that Alice was obviously very pleased about. Lily sat in the middle of Scorpius and Adrian, and Izzy and Liam opposite Alice and Louis. Most of the time was spent laughing and joking around, and when the food trolley came around Scorpius and Louis bought a whole train worth of sweets for just their compartment.

But the journey home seemed to be over in a few minutes, as before she knew it, Lily was standing on the platform saying goodbye to her friends. Effy gave both Lily and Hugo a hug, and Lily noticed Hugo blush slightly. Adrian hugged Lily and lifted her in the air. He put her down, laughing, and Lily smiled because she knew her family would've seen that. Jay high-fived everyone and walked away. Soon it was just Scorpius left to say goodbye to. He wrapped his arms around Lily and buried one of his hands in her long red hair.

"Remember what I told you, red. Have a great holiday." He whispered to her. He let go and turned to Hugo.

He slapped the younger boy's hand with a grin. "Take care of her, Hugh. And don't let the Potter boys get you down. It's Christmas!" Scorpius shouted the last sentence, managing to get annoyed looks from others around them. Hugo laughed and then he and Lily both turned to walk to their family.

Lily gulped when she saw her father's face, and she heard Hugo do the same. She looked over to Uncle Ron and saw his face was almost purple. She glanced sideways at Hugo and he nodded at her, both of them bracing themselves for the rant they were about to receive.

"Was that _Malfoy_?" Uncle Ron spat, and Hugo flinched.

"Yes, it was." Hugo replied calmly, and Lily could tell how much effort he was putting into keeping his voice steady.

"Why were you talking to him?"

"Because he's my friend."

"You can't be friends with a Malfoy!" Ron roared, and Hermione put her hand on his arm.

"Well, I am. So deal with it. Are you really going to lecture me over something you have no control over?" Hugo shot back, obviously shocking his father.

"No control?"

"Yes, father, that is what I said. I'm glad you're paying attention." Lily stifled a giggle at Hugo's words. Ron, however, didn't find it funny at all. His face turned a deeper shade of purple and his voice was rising with every word.

"I have control! I am in control! You will _not _disobey me!" Ron spat at Hugo's feet. Hugo stood shocked for a moment before speaking.

"You know what? That just crossed the fucking line." Ron opened his mouth to reprimand him for swearing but Hugo didn't let him interrupt. "You have no control over me anymore. _None. _I'm sorry I'm not Rose. I'm sorry I'm not fucking perfect. But at least I have a personality, _father_. Have you forgotten that's who you are after all your spitting at me? You don't deserve the title. I don't want to even breathe the same air as you. You are _nothing _to me."

Hugo spun on his heel and walked straight through the barrier, leaving an open-mouthed Ron staring at the spot where he had just been. Every eye – apart from Ron's – was now on Lily. She cowered under their glares. But then she remembered how she'd done nothing wrong. All she'd done was become a Slytherin and be friends with the "Slytherin Prince". She seemed to grow taller with every thought she had. With every eye still on her, she turned and walked away from them too. After a few paces she broke out into a run and rushed through the barrier, searching the platform for her best friend. When she couldn't see him, she ran outside the station and found him sitting against the wall. She sat down next to him without saying a word.

They sat in silence for a few more minutes, neither one of them even moving an inch. Eventually, Hugo spoke.

"Can I stay at yours for a few days?" He asked, and Lily knew he wasn't looking at her as to obscure the view of the tears in his eyes.

"Of course."

"Will your parents let me?"

"Probably not, but they don't need to know." She winked at him, and he finally looked at her. His cheeks were full of angry red splotches, and his long eyelashes were slightly damp. His eyes were red and puffy, while his hair looked ruffled, as though he'd been running his hands through it. "I'm sorry." She said, and this time it was she who looked away from him.

"What for?" Lily heard the confused tone of his voice.

"This is my fault. If it wasn't for me, that fight wouldn't have happened. I'm sorry." She shuffled her feet.

"Lil," He started, and he put his arm around her, "This is not your fault. This is _his _fault. I'm glad you're still my best friend and that you've introduced me to your friends because now they're mine too. I feel more Slytherin than Gryffindor, which is what I think Albus sees me as now. I'm not a Gryffindor. Well, I suppose I am; Sorting Hat said so. But I'm not meant for that crowd. I'm not meant to be just another Weasley. I'd rather be a Slytherin any day."

"That's because all the best people are in Slytherin." Lily winked, looking up at him.

Hugo laughed. "Yes, yes they are."

"How are we going to get back to mine?" Lily asked, eventually.

"Er," Hugo had obviously not thought of this either, "Knight Bus?" He suggested.

"I have enough money in my pocket for us to get it, so that should be fine." Hugo nodded, and they both stood up. Lily outstretched her arm, and-

BANG!

A purple triple-decker bus appeared in front of them, making Lily jump.

"Merlin," She muttered while Hugo laughed at her.

Once on the bus, they started to plan what they were going to do.

"Well, seeing as we both live on the same road, getting your stuff is not going to be a problem. All you have to do is stand outside your window and summon it, easy."

"But what about getting into your house? That's gotta be a little bit harder."

"Remember the old treehouse?"

"Yeah, we used to climb up there and then go into your room– oh."

"Exactly."

"This is why you're in Slytherin. You're very cunning." He grinned, and Lily laughed.

"Okay, so while you're getting your stuff, I'll climb up and get my window open, ready for you to come in. Then you can just sleep in my room. I'll keep the door locked too so my parents won't walk in and find you."

"And we can use the _Muffliato _charm to make sure they don't hear us too. It's a good job we're not muggle-born. We're so good at this." He added as an afterthought.

They sat laughing and joking for a while longer until they got to Godric's Hollow. Then, as planned, Lily climbed up the treehouse and unlocked her windows with a spell. She climbed in through her window smoothly, and immediately locked her door. She cast the _Muffliato _charm to make sure the rest of her family didn't hear her, and waited until she saw the familiar brown curls of Hugo's hair. He clambered into her room carefully and locked the window behind him. Then they both turned to look at each other, both of them moments away from bursting into peals of laughter.

"I'd call that plan successful." Hugo stated.

"I think that makes about three of our plans." Lily nodded. Then both of their faces split into impish grins, and they couldn't hold their laughter anymore.

It took almost half an hour for the pair of them to stop sniggering, and even then they ended up laughing randomly. After an hour, they both finally regained their composures.

"I bet my parents won't even notice I'm gone." Hugo said after a few moments of silence. Lily did not miss the dejected tone that he had tried to cover up.

"Yeah they will. But don't worry; it'll end up being my fault." She tried to pass it off as a joke, but a small part of her knew it was true. Her brothers would blame her for turning Hugo against his own house, and Rose would probably think Lily was corrupting her younger brother.

"Well, our siblings will blame it on you, at least," Hugo nodded, seeming to think along the same lines as her, "But my father will know it's my fault. He won't accept that's who I am, but he'll know it's my fault."

Lily hesitated before speaking. "Hugo, why do you think your dad doesn't accept who you are?" She knew it was a personal question, and she almost expected him not to answer. But he did anyway.

"I think... I think it's because he always had this image planned out for me. His son was going to be a Gryffindor, and top of his class, and work in the Ministry, and marry a girl who was also a Gryffindor and just as smart as he was. But I'm not that son. Sure, I'm a Gryffindor. But I don't like any of the rest of them and I hang out with Slytherins – don't think good old Rosie hasn't told him that... And sure, I do okay in school, but I'm not top of my class and I'm sure as hell not as smart as Rose. But he doesn't get that that's just who I am. He thinks that it's just a phase... or that I'm rebelling against him. But that's not why he punishes me for it. I don't think he really cares if I rebel. I think he's actually just scared that I'm not, and that this is really me. So I let him have that fantasy for a while. But now that I'm actually in Hogwarts, and I've finally been able to really be myself, he needs to let that dream go. He's just not ready to." He spoke slowly, as though he was only just figuring this out himself.

Lily nodded. "I think my dad's the same with me. Like with my clothes, and how I act, and how I've been Sorted. I don't think it bothers him because he thinks it's just an act, and that I'll grow out of it because I'm only eleven. I guess they both just need to wake up and realise that we're not the five year old little kids we used to be."

Hugo nodded in agreement, and Lily, wanting to change the subject, started talking about Quidditch. They sat up talking for another few hours until they decided it was time to go to bed. Lily set up a little makeshift bed for Hugo on the floor, which he happily climbed into, stating that it was comfier than expected. Lily laughed as she turned out the light and removed the _Muffliato _charm.

Tomorrow was going to be a long day.

* * *

><p>"Lily!" Someone bashing on the door woke Lily with a start. "Lily! Are you in there?" Lily groaned and turned over in her bed, too tired to answer. "Lily Luna Potter, I swear to Merlin if you are in there and ignoring me I will ground you until you're thirty-five!"<p>

Lily rolled her eyes at the door. "I can't answer if I'm asleep!" She called, and the banging stopped.

"Lily Luna! Don't ever scare me like that again!" Lily heard the sound of Ginny Potter's voice from behind her door.

"By being asleep?"

"By running off!"

"I ran off to comfort my best friend; I didn't tell you to leave the platform." Lily said in an accusing tone. She looked at the clock on her bedside table, and realised with a groan that it was six thirty in the morning.

"Well, now your best friend is missing, so you obviously didn't do a very good job of comforting him!"

Lily opened her mouth to say that of course he wasn't missing, because she could see him right now, but she stopped herself just in time. "Missing? What do you mean, missing?" She put on her best frantic voice.

"He never came home last night. We need you down here immediately!"

"Let me get dressed, I'll be down there in a moment." Lily said, still working the franticness into her voice.

"Hurry!"

As soon as she heard her mother's footsteps on the stairs, she threw her pillow at Hugo's sleeping form. He groaned and waved her off, not bothering to open his eyes.

"Hugo Arthur Weasley! My mother has just ordered me to go downstairs because _you're_ supposedly missing, now _get up_!" Lily spoke as loud as she could without anyone else hearing her. Again, Hugo just groaned. "Hugo, do not make me pour water on you!"

He didn't seem to hear her, and Lily smirked. She grabbed her wand from her bedside table and pointed it at her cousin. "_Aguamenti!_" A jet of water shot from the tip of Lily's wand and fell onto Hugo's face, drenching his brown curls.

"Lily! What the hell?" He spluttered as Lily laughed.

"I told you I would! Now you need to get up!" She explained the situation to him again, but this time he paid attention.

"Okay, so what do I do?" He said when she'd finished.

Lily thought for a moment. "Go out the window and just sit outside somewhere. Not in plain sight of either of the houses, but still in Godric's Hollow. That way, they won't think you slept here and neither of us will get in trouble for lying to my parents. Well, hiding from my parents, anyway. Is that okay to you?"

"Okay, sure, but what if they don't believe me?"

"What else are they going to believe?" Lily said, shrugging. Hugo nodded and hastily climbed out of the window. Lily got rid of the makeshift bed on her floor, pulled on a pair of jeans, and hurried downstairs. She entered the kitchen and found her mother, her father, Uncle Ron, and Aunt Hermione all sitting around the table looking frantic.

"Lily!" She hardly got a glance around the room before her mother had enveloped her into a hug. "Never scare me like that again, okay?" Ginny Potter kissed her daughter on her head and kept her arms wrapped tightly around her youngest child. When she finally let go, Lily was pulled into another hug by her father.

"I've got you, princess. I've got you." He murmured, and Lily had the feeling he was talking more to himself than he was to her.

"Er, guys? I thought we were concentrating on Hugo?" Lily said, her voice muffled by the hug.

"Oh, yes, of course." Harry said, but he still waited another few moments before letting go of her.

For the next fifteen minutes, Ron and Hermione explained to the three Potters that Hugo had not come home and hadn't gone to the Burrow and they had no idea where he was. Lily felt terrible to watch them talk in such frantic tones, as she knew exactly where Hugo was and where he had been. But, as planned, she let them talk and let them discuss ideas while pretending to formulate her own.

"Rose wouldn't have done this." Ron spoke, snapping Lily out of her thoughts. "Rose would never have done this." He repeated, and Lily felt her blood boil. "Why does he do this? Why can't he be more like his sister? He could've been a proud Gryffindor! He was _supposed _to be a proud Gryffindor! But no, that's too simple for him. And of course, I come off as the bad guy because I won't let him hang around with disgusting, slimy _snakes_." He hissed the last word. Lily had felt her temper rising with every word that he said. He'd obviously forgotten that she was a Slytherin now. She snarled at him.

"Lily," Her father warned. Evidently, he hadn't noticed that his princess had just been insulted by his best friend.

"Sorry, dad, I guess I just don't like being called disgusting and slimy. I suppose it's just a pet peeve of mine." She said sarcastically, shocking the adults in the room. It seemed everyone had forgotten she was a Slytherin.

"Lily, I didn't mean you," Ron started, but Lily cut him off.

"Yes, you did. But we have more pressing issues right now. But I do want to say just one thing: don't compare Hugo to Rose. You don't have any idea how that makes him feel, do you? You know how you have lots of older brothers that you felt you had to live up to? Hugo only has one sibling, but you put her up so high on that pedestal that it feels like he has just as many as you do. And you judge him for running off? You're the one who _spat _on him, and forbade him to be friends with someone that also happens to be one of my best friends too; I'd just like to point out. You don't have as much control over him as you think you do. And if you think that it's okay to treat him the way you are right now, then you don't deserve him." Lily paused, allowing him to take in what she'd said, which she was pretty sure he wasn't going to do. "Now, come on. He'll probably be around here somewhere."

She led all the adults outside, and they began their search, with Lily telling them which directions to take. She deliberately told Ron to go the complete opposite way, and she told her mother to go in the direction that she knew Hugo was sitting in. It was less than twenty minutes before she was back, towing a shabby-looking Hugo behind her. When he was sure none of the other adults were looking, he shot Lily a wink, and she grinned back. She then ran to hug him, acting like she had been so worried about him and telling him to never do that to her again. She felt him stifle a snigger into her shoulder.

As soon as Lily had let go, Hermione ran towards him and pulled him into a hug and didn't let go for at least seven minutes, while Ron stood awkwardly behind her. When Hermione had finally released her son, Hugo stepped forward and faced his father. Neither of them spoke for a moment, and then Ron cleared his throat.

"Harry and I have agreed that you can stay with him while you sort things out," He coughed, "While _we _sort things out." He corrected. Hugo nodded and held out his hand to his father. Ron stared at it for a moment before shaking it. Hugo then turned to his aunt and uncle and muttered his thanks, and then continued back into the Potter house, his arm around Lily's shoulders.

"Well that turned out better than expected," He commented before his head hit the pillow and he fell asleep.

Lily rolled her eyes at him and clambered back into bed herself. Before she too fell back to sleep, she found herself staring at the photo of her, Albus, and James on her bedside table. White blonde hair and grey eyes came to her mind as tears stung her eyes.

_They don't deserve me._

**A/N**_  
><em>

**It's been exactly a month since I last updated, so I am truly very sorry. This chapter has taken me so long to write, I had HUGE writer's block. I knew what I wanted to happen, I just didn't know how to get to those points from this other point, if that makes any sense? Either way, this is what I've got. I hope you guys like it, because I've spent so long on it. I'm happy with it, and it has included everything that I needed it to. The Hugo sections are more important to the overall plot line, but the first section is important to another plot line that I've planned, so this chapter is very important - hence the long wait. **

**Anyway, I might not be updating for another little while. There's a lot I need to happen in the next chapter. It's not really as important as this one was, but there's still key details in there. Also, we get another glimpse of Lily's brothers and we get to know what news Teddy has to tell. Any guesses? It's not really that hard to figure out, I just kinda want to know what you guys think.**

**But yea, please review!**

**Thanks guys,**

**beccasophX**


	6. Taking a Break

_SUMMARY: Lily has always lived a shadow, whether it was her brothers' or her father's. So when she finds herself with the enemies of her brothers, how will they take it? And what about Scorpius Malfoy, who always seems to have an eye on her? Lily goes through drastic changes in perspective, and she starts to wonder, are her brothers really the Golden Boys everyone says they are?_

* * *

><p><strong>NOT JUST A POTTER<strong>

**Taking a Break**

"Okay, so, as you know, I have an announcement." Teddy spoke loudly, his arm snaking around Victoire's waist. They'd been together for almost as long as Lily could remember, and she'd never known a couple more perfect for each other. She cringed as she thought it, but she couldn't help thinking it was true. She had already guessed what the announcement was, and she could see the nervousness on Teddy's face as he spoke. Most of the Potter-Weasley-Lupin clan was squeezed together on a table in the garden of the Burrow. The Potters, Ron and Hermione, Hugo and Rose, Bill and Fleur, Teddy and Victoire, Dominique and Louis, George and Angelina, Fred and Roxy, and Charlie were there. Percy, Audrey, Molly, and Lucy were all in Paris, a Christmas treat from Percy.

"My little girl better not be pregnant, boy." Uncle Bill said jokingly, and Teddy managed a shaky laugh.

"Well, er, I guess I should just come out and say it. I asked Victoire to marry me, and she said yes! We're getting married!" Almost before the words had left his mouth, Teddy was enveloped in a huge hug from both Bill and Fleur, and Harry and Ginny both jumped up to congratulate the couple. Lily saw a genuine smile on Dominique's face, which had to be a first. She didn't know the ice queen _could _smile. Lily grinned too, noticing the glow of both Teddy's and Victoire's faces as they looked at each other. Lily could see how much they loved each other by just looking at their eyes; they lit up whenever they looked at each other.

"Alright, Teddy boy!" James cheered.

"Yeah, Teddy boy!" Albus called, and Lily bit back a laugh. Was he seriously incapable of his own thoughts?

"Congratulations!" Lily heard the word practically a thousand times in the next few minutes, and she had to admit to saying it at least a hundred times herself. She was happy for her older brother, and she loved Victoire like a sister anyway.

"To Victoire and Teddy. May their days be filled with happiness." Lily rolled her eyes at her father's words, but raised her glass all the same.

"Cheers!" James shouted.

"Cheers!" Albus yelled, and Lily heard Hugo snort into his drink. He caught her eye from across the table and they both sniggered.

Dinner went by in a happy daze, with Harry, Bill, and Teddy talking about the wedding and Victoire, Fleur, and Molly talking about the wedding _dress_. Once dinner had finished, it was around eleven o'clock, and Lily was about to go off to the room she was sharing with Hugo when Teddy called her back.

"Lil? Can I speak to you for a moment?"

Lily followed him into the lounge where she found Victoire and Dominique already sitting in there. She gave Dominique an awkward smile and, after a moment's hesitation, Dominique sent one back. Lily had never had a problem with Dom; it's just that they were never close. Dom wasn't really close with any of the family, apart from her sister. They were as much alike in personality as they were in looks, except Victoire was... nicer. Dominique was just sarcastic all the time and didn't really like anything.

"Well, Teddy and I have decided on only two bridesmaids, and I would love for you both to do the job!" Victoire squealed, and once again Dominique cracked a smile.

_Two in one day_, Lily thought, _that must be a record for her._

She smiled too, and offered her thanks.

"Thank you both! I can't even imagine a wedding without you two being the bridesmaids!"

"But I'm maid of honour, right?" Dominique said almost jokingly.

"Of course." Lily surprised herself by speaking. "I'm sorry, I think it was meant to be you who answered that." She nodded to Victoire, laughing.

"Of course you are, baby sis, and thank Merlin Lily doesn't mind." Victoire said, laughing too.

"Well, duh. I'm your sister. It only fits." Dominique said, the ice that usually laced her voice coming back. Not in a harsh way, just in a 'Dominique' way.

Teddy pulled his little sister into a hug, seemingly unable to wipe the smile off his face. Lily returned the hug happily, wrapping her arms tightly around her brother's tall figure. As much as she tried to, Lily couldn't stop herself thinking about hers and James' moments like these. A single tear leaked from her eye, but she came away from Teddy smiling and laughing, passing it off as happy crying.

She walked down the hall to her room with Dominique. When they reached Dom's door, she stopped.

"Your brothers are idiots, you know."

"I know." Lily sighed.

"Just don't listen to them. James thinks he's a ladies' man and Albus just copies James, and personally I like you better now that you're not, like, with them anymore." Dom smiled again. "And if you ever repeat to anyone that I said that, I will hunt you down, okay?" She said, ice returning to her voice, but only slightly.

"Thanks, Dom. Now that I've got an almost compliment from you I can die happy." Lily grinned, and the corners of Dominique's mouth twitched.

"You're alright, red, you know that?" Dominique surprised her by using her nickname. She thought only Slytherins called her that. "What, you think I don't hear people call you that? You're like the Slytherin Princess."

James walked out of his room as the last two words were said, and he sneered. "Yeah, wow, that's a great accomplishment. Why anyone would be proud to be called that is beyond me." He said, a nasty smile appearing on his lips.

"Yes, because being you is something to be proud of. What have you actually done?" Dom replied, slipping into ice mode instantly.

"I don't need to do anything. I'm James Potter." He said smugly.

"Don't need to do anything, or don't want to do anything that means you have to step out of daddy's spotlight and be your own person?" Dominique shot back, throwing James a little.

"I am my own person. I'm James Potter."

"And what an accomplishment that is."

"What, do you want to be a filthy snake rather than a Gryffindor?"

"To be perfectly honest, Jamie, I don't care. It's a _house _in a _school_. It's not a big deal." Dom said, her voice thick with boredom.

"Fine, fine." James said after a moment. "You're right, Dom. I'm sure Lily's having lots of fun with her _Death Eater friends_." He spoke to Dominique, but his eyes never strayed from Lily. She stared right back, refusing to let him win. He barged past her and went into Albus' room, slamming the door behind him.

Lily bit back tears and ran to her room, not letting Dominique see her eyes. She slammed the door and threw herself on her bed, briefly glancing at Hugo's vacant bed. She was glad for it; she didn't want him to see her cry. She never wanted anyone to see her cry.

She didn't know why _she _was crying. But she couldn't help it. James' voice rang out around the room, his words repeating themselves over and over again in her head.

_Death Eater friends_.

Lily banged her head against the bedpost repeatedly, pounding her fists on the walls. She screamed as she kicked her bed, ignoring the pain she felt in every inch of her body. She threw all her school books on the floor, scattering unfinished papers everywhere. She threw everything her hands touched, shattering a small pot that sat by the window. She smashed her fists on the walls so many times she was sure she heard something break, but she kept pounding anyway, ignoring everything. She could hardly see from the tears that were streaming down her face, and she no longer cared. She didn't care about the room she was wrecking. She didn't care that she knew Hugo would be pissed. She didn't care that her parents would ground her. She didn't care about her brothers. She screamed and punched and kicked and bashed until her voice went hoarse and she became sure her wrists were broken.

She sat down cross-legged on the floor, wiping furiously at her tears. She had no tears left in her anymore. She had nothing left in her anymore. She sat in silence for what seemed like hours, not realising the whole house had gone quiet. She just sat, staring at nothing and unable to think. She turned her arm to look at her wrist. There was a tiny scar there that James had made when she was 8. He'd accidentally cut her when she'd put her hand to close to where he was chopping vegetables for their mother. He'd apologised relentlessly, even after Lily had forgiven him, but the scar had stayed. Lily had always liked it, in some weird way. She thought it kind of proved that even James could make mistakes sometimes, even little ones. No one ever thought James could make mistakes.

Lily curled herself up on the floor, wrapping her arms around herself and tucking her knees into her chest. She laid her head on the hard floor trying to ignore the throbbing in her head and the pain in her arms and legs. She was cold with no blankets but she didn't move to climb into her bed. She just lay curled up on the floor, not wanting to think and not wanting to move.

She just wanted to lie there and forget everything.

* * *

><p>The next morning, Lily woke up in her bed with her covers wrapped tightly around her. As she opened her eyes, she found Hugo and Scorpius kneeling beside her, pressing a cold flannel to her forehead.<p>

"Hey, red." Scorpius smiled.

"Scorpius? What are you doing here?" Lily sat up in bed, immediately noting how the pain in her wrists had gone completely.

"Hugo wrote me. Said you might need to get out of here for a few days so we spoke to your parents and they've agreed that you can stay at mine until after the lame ass dinner party thing."

"Er, not that I'm complaining or anything, but why you?"

"Well, Hugo figured it make more sense considering you'll be at mine soon anyway, and because I know it would piss of your bro– certain people in this house." Scorpius corrected quickly, coughing to try and cover it up. She gave him a small smile.

"Okay, thanks then." Lily said awkwardly, not wanting Scorpius to see how happy she really was at the prospect of not having to see her brothers for a few days.

"No problem." Scorpius smiled.

"I'll go get your parents. They wanted to see you before you went. We told them a bunch of you were staying at Scorpius'; we knew you wouldn't want us to tell them about you and Ja- your brothers. I'll be downstairs after that, so when Lily's changing you can come down without fear of running into the Potter brothers, Scorp." Hugo said, nodding towards the other two and heading out the door.

"Running into your brothers... tempting." Scorpius stayed silent for a moment, carefully dabbing at her forehead. "So do you want to talk about what happened? Or do you want to wait till we're at mine?" He asked. He wasn't pushing, Lily noted. He was honestly worried about her.

"Later," she replied, and Scorpius nodded.

"Sure. Dominique got some stuff together for you. I liked her. She seemed quite Slytherin actually. Not very Weasley. She said you don't have any dresses, which I honestly wasn't surprised at." He laughed. "So I figure sometime when you're at mine we'll head into Diagon Alley or somewhere and get you something, yeah? My treat."

"I... No, I can't let you... I can buy it..." Lily mumbled.

"Hey, think of it as my way of cheering you up."

"You're buying me a dress to cheer me up?" Lily smirked, rolling her eyes.

"Yeah, not sure how that one worked out but hey, whatever, right?" Scorpius laughed, mimicking Lily by rolling his.

"Well, thanks, then." Lily said, letting a grin take over her lips. There was a knock on the door.

"Lily? Can we come in?" Lily heard her mother's voice through the door, and she called out to allow them in. The door opened and Ginny Potter hesitated before entering the room, closely followed by her husband. Ginny rushed over to her daughter's bedside while Harry simply stood by Scorpius, who shifted uncomfortably.

"So, my daughter will be staying at your house? At the manor?" Harry asked Scorpius, and Scorpius seemed relieved he had not been the one to initiate conversation.

"Yes, sir. My mother and father have agreed to it, and are excited to meet Lily. I've told them a lot about her." Scorpius added, and Lily willed herself not to blush.

"And she'll be back on the 21st, yes?"

"Yes, sir." Scorpius replied, and Harry nodded curtly.

Harry and Ginny stayed with them for a few more minutes before saying goodbye to their youngest child. Ginny kissed her daughter on her cheek and hugged her before leaving the room. Harry did the same, and paused by the door before leaving. He turned to Scorpius.

"Could you please tell your parents I said hello?" He asked, and Scorpius nodded. "And if you see your grandmother, could you also tell her the same? Thank you." He said when Scorpius had nodded for the second time. Harry shut the door behind him, leaving Scorpius looking quite shocked.

"Wow. Never thought I'd see the day Harry Potter would accept me into his house." He shook his head.

"I guess he likes you." Lily grinned.

"Oh good, because you know I've spent my entire life wishing the whole Potter household would accept me." He laughed. "I suppose for now I'll just _settle _for you."

"Settle?" Lily said in a mock offended voice.

"Don't worry, red, you'll always be my favourite." Scorpius winked, and Lily shoved him playfully.

"Yeah, I better be." She grinned. She then realised she was still in bed and threw the covers off her. She looked down to find herself wearing pyjamas and her face turned red as she realised someone must have changed her. "Now get out." She said to Scorpius.

"What?"

"I need to change." She grinned, and she thought she saw a faint red tinge on Scorpius' pale face as he laughed.

"Okay, okay, I'll go downstairs then and just come down when you've got everything and we'll Floo over to mine." He said before heading out the door. He shut it and Lily sighed. Scorpius made everything sound so easy. She looked around her room and saw papers littered everywhere, and a broken chair leg lay on the floor. The worst of the mess had been cleared up, but the remaining few bits and pieces of last night were still there. Looking around, Lily felt a lump in her throat, but she forced it down. She didn't want to cry again. She _wouldn't _cry again. She wouldn't be weak.

It only took her five minutes to get washed and dressed, so she figured she'd look what Dom had packed for her. It was mostly alright; although she had packed a few skirts that Lily really had no idea why she owned as she never wore them. And she really didn't know why Dom had packed them, considering she knew Lily would never wear them _and _it was winter. But then again, Dom never took seasons into account. She pretty much always wore skirts and shorts; she didn't care what anyone thought of her. Lily replaced the skirts with her favourite two pairs of skinny jeans and headed downstairs after pulling her hair up into a high ponytail and grabbing her bag.

As she descended the staircase she saw Hugo and Scorpius sitting on the tatty old sofa in the lounge. Dominique sat on the armchair facing the boys, her long legs dangling over the arms of the chair. Lily studied her closely. She was laughing, her wide smile lighting up her face. Her hair was perfectly tousled, as always, and she was wearing shorts, showing off her model legs. But she wasn't, Lily noticed. Showing them off. She was just being her usual, care-free self. Usually, everyone fawned around her when she was being herself. They gawped at her and they couldn't take their eyes off of her. But Scorpius wasn't like that. He wasn't staring at her. He wasn't hypnotised by her like everyone else always seemed to be. He was just laughing with her. Like they were old friends. Lily was almost glad. She didn't want Scorpius to be mesmerised by Dominique. She liked that he was different.

"Red! You all set?" Scorpius turned his head to look at her.

"Yep, I'm ready."

"Awesome. Let's go then." He said, jumping to his feet.

"Your parents are out. I'll just tell them you said bye, and that you're dying your hair blue and getting a bellybutton piercing." Dominique said, now flipping through a magazine.

"Sure, sure. Your parents know about yours yet?"

"Please." Dom scoffed. "Dad would _freak_." Lily laughed. Dom had got a Muggle belly button piercing the year before, even though she'd been only twelve. She'd Confunded the muggle so he would do it on her even though she was underage. But Dom was right; she wouldn't ever be able to leave the house again if her dad found out.

Scorpius took Lily's bags with a smile, and Lily saw him look over her shoulder and blush. At Dominique. Lily felt her insides squirm a little, but she shook the feeling off. Scorpius climbed into the fireplace, took a pinch of Floo powder and threw it in the flames.

"Malfoy Manor!" He said clearly. Green flames rose around him and he disappeared.

Lily waited a moment before stepping into the fireplace herself. She repeated Scorpius' actions and then suddenly the flames rose and she was spinning rapidly, Hugo and Dominique disappearing out of sight. Then it all stopped, and Lily found herself falling. Lily squeezed her eyes shut as polished wood floor was coming closer and closer. Then Lily felt an arm reach out and grab her around her middle, pulling her up to her feet swiftly and smoothly. When she looked up she saw Scorpius smirking at her, his eyes glinting.

"See, this is why _I _go first." He said, and she could see him holding back his laughter.

"Shut up." Lily grumbled.

"I'm sorry, was that 'thanks Scorpius, you're the best friend ever and you're so amazing, they should put your face on money'?" He smirked.

"No."

"I think it was."

"Well, I suppose I'll just let you be wrong. You seem to enjoy it. I mean, why else would you be wrong so often?"

"Name one time when I've been wrong."

"Just then, genius."

"Ah, so you admit that I'm a genius. Malfoy 1, Luna 0." He laughed, and Lily scowled at him playfully.

"You're so funny." Lily said with a sarcastic smile.

"I know, but it's nice to hear you say it."

* * *

><p>After Scorpius had showed her to the guest room where she would be sleeping, which was across the hall from Scorpius', and they'd dumped her stuff in the room, they headed back downstairs to see Scorpius' family – something Lily had been slightly worried about. She knew she probably shouldn't be, because if they were anything like Scorpius she knew they'd get along great, but as much as she tried to shake it she couldn't help feeling worried that they might not like her.<p>

Scorpius led her into what seemed to be the dining room of the house. Lily noticed a chandelier hanging from the ceiling, and she noted, as she had in every other room for some reason, that everything was polished to perfection. There wasn't a speck of dust in sight throughout the whole house; everything gleamed and shined like it was brand new. Four adults, two men and two women, sat around a large table in the middle of the room, all of them with the same white blonde hair that was so familiar to Lily.

"Ah, so this must be Miss Potter!" One of the men stood up and smiled at Lily. "I'm Scorpius' father, Draco Malfoy. I'm very pleased to meet you; Scorpius has told us so much about you." He held out his hand to her, and out of the corner of her eye she saw Scorpius blush.

"Thank you, sir." Lily smiled back, shaking his hand. "But please, call me Lily."

"Of course, Lily. Named after your grandmother, I presume?" Draco asked.

"Yes, sir. I'm Lily Potter II." She said, unable to stop herself crinkling her nose in distaste. She didn't like the 'the second' on the end of her name. It made it sound so... formal. Something Lily was certainly not.

"Well, I can't say first-hand that you look like her, but I can say that you look exactly like your mother." Draco smiled again.

"I had the privilege of meeting Lily Potter I, and I daresay you look almost identical. Except for the eyes, of course. You have your mother's eyes." The other man said, standing up and walking over to shake Lily's hand. The last words he said reminded Lily of something her father used to talk about when she was little; everyone always used to tell him he looked exactly like his father, except for the eyes. He had his mother's eyes. Lily leaned forward to shake this man's hand, snapping out of her thoughts. "Forgive me – Lucius Malfoy, dear. It's a pleasure to meet you." He smiled, and the name brought back a memory for Lily. She remembered Uncle Ron talking about Lucius Malfoy. He said that he was evil, conniving, and manipulative, but looking into Lucius' grey eyes now, Lily couldn't understand.

Lily realised she'd been silent for a minute when she noticed Lucius' stance become slightly awkward. "I'm sorry," she said, "You both just look so much like Scorpius." Lily felt a little twang in her stomach for lying, but she could hardly say what she'd really been thinking. She noticed Lucius suddenly relaxing.

"I know what you mean, dear. He's got no Black or Greengrass in him at all." One of the women sitting at the table said. She stood up and surprised Lily a little by pulling her into a hug. "I'm Astoria Malfoy, Scorpius' mother." Astoria smiled warmly at Lily.

"And I'm Narcissa Malfoy, Draco's mother." The other woman said, also pulling Lily into a hug. Narcissa looked around at the looks she was getting from the others. "Well, _grandmother_ makes me sound old!"

"You don't look a day over 85, Mother." Draco said, and Lily saw a familiar smirk play across his lips.

"Watch that lip, boy. You're not too old for a smack, you know." Narcissa replied, but Lily saw the amused glint in her eye that told her she was joking.

"Well, it's lovely to meet all of you." Lily laughed with the rest of them.

"Sir? Havelock and Xavier has prepared your foods!" A little voice squeaked from a doorway that Lily hadn't noticed before. An elf stood there, and Lily knew that if she stood next to the elf, it would only just come up to her knee.

"Thank you, Havelock." Draco smiled warmly at the elf, his eyes twinkling. Lily couldn't help but think all the facial expressions ran in the family, for she had seen that look on Scorpius' face many times.

_Actually_, Lily thought, studying Scorpius, _his eyes sparkle all the time_.

After dinner, Scorpius and Lily headed upstairs. Scorpius led her into his room and locked the door while she sat on his bed.

"So what happened?" He said, after a few moments of silence. Lily noted that he still wasn't pushing her. He was still just worried.

"James." Lily choked out a reply.

"What did he do?"

"He said... He..." Lily shifted uncomfortably. She didn't know how Scorpius would take hearing this. "He said I had Death Eater friends." She said after a few moments hesitation. Scorpius sighed heavily, avoiding her gaze for a moment.

"Prick."

"Scorpius, I'm so sorry."

"Hey, you're the one who's related to that bastard. I'm sorry for you." He smirked, brushing a bit of hair out of Lily's eyes. He hesitated another moment before speaking again. "Hugo said you had a sort of... fit. I doubt that's the right word but I guess that's–"

"That hasn't happened since I was eight years old." Lily said, not realising that she'd said her thought aloud until she looked at Scorpius' face.

"Why?" Scorpius asked. "I mean, if you told want to tell me, that's fine..." He said hastily.

"No, it's fine. I don't know. Sometimes when I was little, something would set me off. Something would get me so upset or angry that I couldn't deal with it. So I just took it out on everything around me. I punched things, and I kicked things, and I just let go of everything. I could just ignore the pain and let everything flow out of me. I could stop feeling the physical pain and just focus on the mental stuff. It always hurt like hell in the morning, though." Lily added, at a half-attempt at a joke. Scorpius stayed silent for a moment. "Scorpius?"

"Hmm?"

"Am I crazy?"

"No, Lily. Not at all. It's natural to want to let go of all your feelings. You just take a more direct approach."

"Are you sure?"

"Absolutely. Besides, normal's boring." He grinned, and Lily felt the corners of her mouth twitch.

"No, being a Potter is boring. Normal's... different."

"Normal's only different to abnormal people. If you were normal, you'd spend your whole life wishing you weren't."

"I've already spent a lot of mine wishing I was." Lily admitted.

"Well then you're stupid," Scorpius smiled.

"Gee, thanks." Lily said playfully.

"Well, anyone who doesn't want to be anything like you is pretty stupid to me." Scorpius said, and Lily smiled; while she was here, she could take a break from her brothers for a while. She could be happy for a while. She didn't have their presence weighing down on her, and she was with one of her best friends. She already knew these next few days would be brilliant, and her stay had hardly even begun.

**A/N**

**Okay, well first thing, I'm really sorry I haven't updated. But I promise, quicker updates from now on. Well, hopefully anyway. **

**Anyway, I'm not writing a long a/n because I've had to write this out twice now because my internet has decided to be retarded, so I'm just gonna leave it there.**

**Please review!**

**Thanks guys,**

**beccasophX**


	7. Your Way With Words Is Through Silence

_SUMMARY: Lily has always lived a shadow, whether it was her brothers' or her father's. So when she finds herself with the enemies of her brothers, how will they take it? And what about Scorpius Malfoy, who always seems to have an eye on her? Lily goes through drastic changes in perspective, and she starts to wonder, are her brothers really the Golden Boys everyone says they are?_

* * *

><p><strong>NOT JUST A POTTER<strong>

**Your Way With Words Is Through Silence**

"Lil?"

"Mmm?"

"Why are we just lying on the grass?"

"Because it's sunny."

"It's not real sun."

"It's still warm."

Lily heard Scorpius' laugh, and could picture him rolling his eyes. She heard movement beside her and opened her eyes to see Scorpius propped up on his elbow.

"You're not getting used to this weather thing, are you?" He smirked. Since Lily had been at the Malfoys', she'd discovered that even in winter it was sunny at Malfoy Manor. Astoria had explained that it was a simple spell used so Scorpius could go outside in the winter and not get too cold, and so it always looked like summer outside. Lily loved it. She was so used to the snow, which had fallen earlier and heavier this year, and she was almost tired of it – although she did love having snowball fights.

Lily and Scorpius had gone outside to play a one-on-one Quidditch match. When they had finished, Lily just lay on the ground, soaking in all the sun. Scorpius lay down beside her, occasionally mumbling something about it not being real sun.

Lily glared at Scorpius before closing her eyes again.

"What time is it?" She murmured.

"Er, 3ish?" Scorpius replied. "Something like that."

"And what time does the dinner party start?"

"Well, dinner starts at half 7, but you're expected to be there like an hour before to _mingle_." He answered, and Lily heard the disgust in his voice at the word _mingle_.Then Lily heard him as he shot up suddenly. "Shit. Did I tell you about mother wanting to help you get ready? Please tell me I did, otherwise she's gonna screw at me."

"No, you didn't." Lily said, propping herself up, a half-smile playing at her lips at the mere thought of Astoria Malfoy 'screwing' at anyone. She was so calm and lovely; it was hard to believe Scorpius ever got told off.

"Shit." He repeated. "Hey Lil?"

"Yeah?"

"Mum was wondering if she could help you get ready."

Lily laughed. She lay back on the grass for another five seconds and then stood up, brushing bits of grass from her jeans. Scorpius jumped up after her, ruffling his white blonde hair as he stood.

"Why does she want to help me get ready?" Lily asked. "Not that it's a problem, of course. I was just wondering." She added hurriedly.

"You're too polite when you're here, you know that? It's not the Lily I'm used to." Scorpius smirked. "And it's just a thing of hers. It's like she's six years old and dressing up her dolls." He shook his head.

"Is that what you did when you were six?" Lily grinned.

"Lil, please, I've never stopped." He joked, returning her smile. Scorpius threw his arm around her and they started their walk back up to the manor.

* * *

><p>"Lily?" Scorpius' voice sounded through the door a few hours later. "Are you ready?"<p>

Lily checked herself in the mirror. She was wearing a forest green dress that came to just above her knees with sleeves that stopped halfway down her arms. She paired the dress with some black tights and flats, with a silver necklace as the finishing piece.

_Slytherin colours,_ Lily thought as she opened the door to her friend. _If only James could see me now._

"About ti–" Scorpius started to joke, but he stopped when he saw her. He looked Lily up and down and a smile played upon his lips.

"What do you think?"

"Wow." He said, seemingly unable to take his eyes off her. Then he shook his head, placing his eyes firmly on hers and willing away the faint pink blush that had crept across his cheeks. "You look amazing." He finally said, smiling warmly at her.

"Thanks," Lily replied, returning the smile.

"Well, Miss Luna," Scorpius said in a posh voice, bowing to her. "Would you do me the honour of letting me escort you to the ballroom?"

"Thank you, kind sir." She joined in, curtseying, taking the arm that he held out for her.

Scorpius led her down the staircase, all the while keeping up his mock-gentlemen show. Lily threw her head back with laughter, not noticing Scorpius' gaze firmly set upon her. Scorpius led her around the extravagant room and, even though it was Scorpius and she knew not to expect any less, Lily could not help but marvel at the crystal chandeliers that hung above her head. The two were stopped a few times by people asking Scorpius things about school and how he was finding it. Scorpius introduced Lily almost immediately, and Lily recognised some of their names from her school friends or something her father or her uncle had mentioned. They all knew Lily, of course, and Lily found herself being told over and over again how much she looked like her mother.

Eventually, once Scorpius was sure his mother would be satisfied at how long he had mingled, he led Lily out of the ballroom and into a separate room where she found Adrian, Alice, Izzy, Liam, and Louis. Alice and Izzy both ran up to hug Lily and Louis and Liam high-fived her. Adrian stood up and flung his arm around her.

"Little Red!" He exclaimed, sitting her down next to him and grinning like a maniac. Adrian used to call her _Little Lily_, but when everyone started to call her _Red _he decided to reuse an old muggle fairytale name that he had heard somewhere. Lily knew it, of course, as her Aunt Hermione had insisted on reading muggle fairytales to all the Potter children as well as her own. Lily had always loved them, and she still did. Lily felt an absence on her arm, and she became fully aware that Scorpius was not there anymore. She shrugged it off, but she couldn't get rid of the feeling that something was missing.

For the next half an hour, the seven friends sat and laughed; the girls complimenting each other's dresses and the boys making fun of each other's dress robes. It turned seven, so the group of Slytherins made their way back into the ballroom. Almost as soon as they had entered the room, Astoria came running up to her son, a panicked look on her face.

"Oh Scorpius! It's a disaster!" She said frantically.

"Was the silver not polished to your standards?" Scorpius joked, but Astoria ignored the sarcastic tone of his voice.

"Much worse! The music was delayed and dinner's about to be served and they're not going to be here on time and everyone is going to think I'm a failure!" Astoria ranted, not pausing to take a breath. Scorpius put his hands on his mother's shoulders and smiled.

"Mother, breathe. It's going to be fine; we'll figure something out, okay? No one's going to think you're a failure. I mean, I'm living proof that you're not." He added jokingly, making Astoria let out a small laugh. She took a deep breath and then smiled.

"I raised a brilliant young man." She smiled at her only son.

"Hey, don't take all the credit. I'm just naturally brilliant." Astoria laughed as if it was a funny joke and patted her son's cheek lightly before walking away to find Narcissa.

"Scorp, I could so do this," Adrian joked, "You've still got that guitar in your room, right?" He laughed, but Scorpius' face lit up like he had a stroke of brilliance – which Lily was sure he _thought _he had.

"Not a bad idea, actually. And Lily could sing." He said it fast, but Lily caught it and her eyes widened in horror.

"You sing?" Adrian asked, raising his eyebrows.

"No!" Lily said, hearing the panic in her own voice. "Scorpius!" She dragged him away from the others and promptly smacked him on his arm.

"Er, ow!"

"Scorpius, what the hell?" She exclaimed.

"Look Lil, you're an amazing singer. And I know you don't want to hear it but it's true." He added before she could interrupt him. "And my mother really needs you. And you don't have to, I understand if you don't, but I'm asking you to do this for me. Please, Lily."

Lily heard the sincerity in his voice and understood that he honestly wouldn't judge her if she said no. But she also saw the plea in his eyes.

"Fine, I'll do it. But this all seems very convenient." Lily grumbled, only half-joking. Scorpius didn't respond in words, but instead he picked her up and spun her around, a crazy grin spreading across his face. He called Adrian over and explained the situation to him, and Lily heard herself ask if he could play a muggle song that she had heard some time before.

The next half an hour seemed to happen in a blur to Lily. She felt like her brain was disconnected to every other part of her body, and all she could do was watch. Scorpius went to talk to his mother, who pulled both Adrian and Lily into a strangling hug, and then fetched the guitar from upstairs. Lily taught Adrian the song, only half aware of what she was doing, and marvelled at how quickly he seemed to learn it.

"What can I say; I've just got a brilliant mind." He'd said, winking at Lily.

Then seven twenty-five came around and Lily found herself fully aware of what she was about to do. She searched the large crowd for a ruffle of white blonde hair and found it almost immediately. She ran over to Scorpius, her heart pounding.

"Scorpius, I can't do this!" She grabbed him, her voice frantic.

"Yes, you can. And I'm not saying that just to be encouraging. I'm saying it because I know it's true. Because you're not doing this for me anymore, you're doing this for you." Scorpius said in a soothing tone. "And I don't want you to think about your brothers, and I don't want you to think about anyone in this room. I want you to think about how strong you are, and I want you to know that that's how you're going to do this. You're going to get up on that stage and sing because that's something you can do better than anyone I know. You're going to do it, and I know that in the back of your mind you'll know that this is how you'll beat your brothers. They don't even have to be here for you to beat them. That's how strong you are." He smiled, and then he crinkled his nose. "Can we pretend I said something less corny if this speech ever comes up again?"

Lily smiled. "Thank you."

She gave him a hug and then ran back to where Adrian was calling her over, just in time to see Narcissa walk on the stage.

"Friends, I welcome you to another Malfoy Christmas Party. I want to thank you all for coming before I forget, so just remember I said that." A patter of laughter ran across the crowd. "Dinner is served... now." She said, and, as if on cue, plates of food filled the tables. A small cheer went through the crowd, and Narcissa laughed. "I hope you all have a wonderful evening. Merry Christmas to you all!" She said, walking off the stage just as Astoria walked on.

"But before we lose your attention, I would like to make an announcement. The music that has been booked tonight is running a little late, and those of you who know me well will know how stressed that made me." Lily heard a few laughs in the crowd. "My son, Scorpius, approached me not long after I told him saying that he had 'coaxed' two of his closest friends into performing a song so we are not without music. So will you all please say a big well done to Scorpius, and welcome to the stage Adrian Zabini and Lily Potter!"

Lily heard a few murmurs underneath the applause.

"_Potter_, did she say?"

"_Lily Potter_?"

People were sitting down at their allocated tables, and Lily found herself once again searching for Scorpius. She found him sitting with the rest of their group, who were all watching Lily and Adrian with eager looks on their faces. Scorpius locked eyes with Lily, and in them she saw the words he was trying to communicate to her. She heard Adrian play the first notes of the song, and she took a deep breath and started to sing. Her voice was clear and strong, and Lily felt herself smile when she saw the shocked look on some people's faces. She closed her eyes.

_I never knew_

_I never knew that everything was falling through_

_That everyone I knew was waiting on a cue_

_To turn and run when all I needed was the truth_

As she opened her eyes, she saw people slow dancing on the floor in front of her. She also saw Louis reach out for Alice, and saw her face light up as he led her to the dance floor. Lily grinned at her, and Alice winked back.

Lily finished the song after what felt like forever to her, and she was met by a roaring applause. Scorpius stood up while he clapped and soon others did the same. Lily felt herself blush furiously but couldn't help but beam. She felt a hand grasp hers and looked around to see Adrian smiling at her, pulling her down for a bow. Eventually, Lily managed to drag Adrian off the stage, and they made their way through the crowd to their friends.

"Lily!" Alice and Izzy squealed in unison.

"You were amazing!" Izzy said excitedly, and Alice nodded eagerly, seemingly at loss for words.

The rest of the group were congratulating Lily wholeheartedly when Narcissa approached. She was accompanied by a man who looked about 25, with dark hair that had undoubtedly been painstakingly styled to look messy and brown eyes so dark they looked black.

"Lily, this is Tyler Avery. Tyler, this is Lily Potter." Narcissa nodded to them both and then walked away. Tyler held out his hand to Lily.

"Lily Potter. Daughter of Harry and Ginny, sister to Albus and James." Tyler said, keeping his eyes locked on hers.

"And Teddy." Lily added, not wanting the person she felt was most like her brother to be forgotten.

"Ah yes, of course, Teddy Lupin." He smiled, not taking his eyes away from her. He was silent for a moment; Lily heard Scorpius cough loudly behind her and she stifled a giggle. "Ah yes, sorry. Let's cut to the chase, shall we? I asked Narcissa to introduce me to you because I'm interested in working with you. I work for a music company, Mead Harvey Inc. Here's my card." He held out a small business card to her. "Call that number in a few years. And, if you forget, don't worry about it; we'll call you. We'd ideally like you to be at least 15 before you call us, but you have real potential, kid. I think you could go far. Real far." Tyler grinned. He nodded to Lily's friends behind her and then walked away, leaving Lily dumbstruck.

Slowly, she turned around to her friends. "Did that just happen?" She asked. The looks on her friends' faces told her it did, but Izzy and Alice still squealed in excitement to make sure Lily knew she hadn't been dreaming. All of her friends congratulated her profusely, with Adrian picking her up and spinning her around – like James used to. Lily thought that could be the only damper on her mood; the thought of her brothers. She looked at Scorpius and knew he could tell she was thinking about them. Lily shook the thought of them from her head, refusing to let them spoil her moment. She grinned at Scorpius, and his face broke into a smile to match hers. He pulled her into a hug and Lily felt him bury his hand in her hair.

"I'm so proud of you," he whispered in her ear, and Lily felt tears come to her eyes. She blinked them away furiously and wrapped her arms even tighter around Scorpius' neck, hoping to convey the words she couldn't say. They pulled away from each other at the same time, and for a moment she found herself caught in Scorpius' intense gaze before he turned away to talk to Adrian. Lily went back to talking to Alice and Izzy, not noticing Scorpius glance back at her once more.

The rest of the evening was spent talking, laughing, and eating. Lily noticed Alice and Louis sitting very close to each other and knowing glances exchanged between Izzy and Liam. Lily was sat between Scorpius and Adrian, the former often being approached by people Lily didn't recognise. Lily had also noted how many glances and whispers were being directed her way, and realised that it definitely wasn't usual to have a Potter at a Malfoy party, let alone have a Potter on the stage. Lily didn't know whether to feel proud or terrified.

It was nearing midnight when people started to leave the Manor. All of Lily's friends had left and it was just her and Scorpius left at their table.

Scorpius leaned in and whispered in her ear. "So, red, are you getting tired yet?"

"I don't think I could sleep at all tonight." She whispered back, a happy smile spreading across her face.

"Well then, care to dance?" Scorpius smiled. He stood up and offered his hand to her. Lily grinned and took it, letting him lead her over to the dance floor. There were others dancing all around them, and realised with shock how _normal _it all was. She knew she shouldn't have been surprised, but she had been taught all her life that Slytherins were bad, and the Malfoys were the worst of the worst. She'd never been taught that they loved, and they danced, and that they were the same as her.

_James would be so proud_, she thought grimly as she wrapped her arms around Scorpius' neck. He fit his hands into her waist and took the lead.

"So, red, having a good time?" He smiled.

"_Good _doesn't adequately describe this feeling. I'd go with 'amazing' or something to that effect." She grinned.

"Well, good to know, because I'm sure my mother and my grandmother will bully me into inviting you next year."

"You wouldn't invite me anyway?" Lily said in a mock offended voice.

"Ugh, Merlin no." Scorpius joked as he took her hand and twirled her around, making Lily laugh. "In all serious though, you did amazingly tonight. And I know that if your brothers weren't complete and utter dicks, they'd be proud of you too. Not half as proud as me of course, as I am completely and utterly _not _a dick."

"Sure about that one?" Lily smirked, "But thank you. I can't believe I'm going to say this but I owe you. It's all down to you that I did that, and I'm still buzzing. Thank you, Scorpius."

"No problem, Lily Luna. Just think of it as an extra Christmas present."

"Well I figured since you bought me one, I should buy you one." He smirked. "No, I actually bought yours a while ago. I put it under your tree when I was around there before."

"Sneaky."

"I am a Slytherin, after all."

Lily grinned, and she rested her head on Scorpius' shoulder – well, his chest; he was quite a bit taller than her.

The song ended and Lily found herself not wanting to leave the dance floor, although she felt a budding exhaustion in the back of her mind.

"So red, how's your Christmas so far?"

"Best Christmas yet."

"Not tired at all?"

"Nope, not even a little bit." Lily lied, only to be given away by a yawn.

"Come on, red. Go up to bed." Scorpius smirked. "Hey, that rhymed!" He said, his eyes shining.

"But I don't want to go." She pouted, "Tomorrow I have to go back to my house with my brothers and everyone else and my parents are probably going to want to _talk _to me and this has been like paradise!" She rambled, making Scorpius smirk.

"Yeah well, even the sun sets in paradise." Scorpius smiled, "And you've got Hugo. I've got to spend the next few days with _my _family, and they're way more embarrassing and awkward than yours."

"I doubt that." Lily laughed.

"All my mother likes to do is ask if there's a, and I quote, _'special girl I want to bring home'_. If she knew the girls in my year, she'd know just to stop asking." Scorpius laughed, and Lily giggled. Now that she thought about it, she'd never seen Scorpius show any romantic interest in any girl. They just weren't the type he'd go for, she supposed. They were too... not Scorpius. She couldn't describe it; they just weren't his type.

"I'd take that over my family any day." She smirked.

"So would I, actually. Christmas with the Potters and the Weasels? No, thank you. I've got you and Hugo, that's enough." He joked, "And Dominique, I suppose. But she's not really like the typical Weasley. For instance, she _has _a personality."

Lily laughed, but it soon turned into another yawn.

"Come on, red, go to bed. I'm actually going to go up too, I'm slightly shattered," Scorpius said. "Let me just say goodnight to my mother."

"Mama's boy," Lily smiled before heading off to bed.

* * *

><p>When Lily got to her house the next day, no one was home. Her mother had left a note on the table saying that she and Lily's father had gone to the Burrow, and Albus and James were out with their friends. So when Lily said goodbye to Scorpius and headed upstairs to her room, she didn't expect to find Hugo in there, his face contorted with anger.<p>

"Hugo?"

"I hate him. And her. They have absolutely no right. I told him before that he'd crossed the line, but _this_? This is more than over the line; this is so far past the line that he can't even see the line!" Hugo growled.

"Okay, I'll take that as a hello, then." Lily joked, but when Hugo looked at her she sighed. "What happened?"

"Rose happened." Hugo stood up, and Lily saw that he was physically shaking with rage.

"What?"

"Rose went and told my _dear old dad_ that I'm really only friends with Slytherins, and, needless to say, he went ballistic. He told me I couldn't hang around with '_those disgusting snakes'_ anymore." He snarled, and Lily couldn't help but feel a little hurt.

"What did you say?" Lily said, if a little quietly.

"I told him that you were one of those 'disgusting snakes' he didn't want me around, and he said that it changed nothing. I need to be around Gryffindors, _the right house_, apparently." Lily felt her stomach sink, finally letting go of the thought that Ron might accept her. She thought it was about time she did, to be honest; Hugo seemed to have done it a long time ago. "So I told him to go screw himself, and then I ran here."

Hugo sat down on the bed and buried his face in his hands. He wasn't crying, but Lily knew what he was feeling. She went and sat down on the bed beside him and he put his arm around her.

"Ever think we're way too young for all this crap?" Lily asked.

"Absolutely." Hugo agreed.

"Oh Merlin, we've got Christmas with them all next."

"If he speaks to me you're going to have to hold me back, because I will punch him." Hugo paused, "Wait, no, don't stop me. He deserves it. And hey, if you want I could punch Al and James too."

Lily laughed, and then they sat in silence for a few minutes.

"It's not just him that gets me angry, you know." Hugo said softly.

"Hmmm?"

"It's my mum, too." He spoke quietly, as though afraid his mother would hear him. "She just stands there, silent. I'd rather she shout at me too, but she just lets my dad do it. I hate it. It's like she doesn't care. She just doesn't _do _anything. She just stands there. Do you know what I mean?"

Lily nodded. She had noticed Aunt Hermione standing still while Uncle Ron yelled at Hugo, and she knew it would annoy her if she was in that situation. Lily internally kicked herself; all this time she was fixating on her problems, when Hugo had it worse. He had a sister who never did anything for anyone else and was _still_ the favourite; he had a dad that shouted at him for everything he did; he had a mother who did nothing and just watched as her husband and daughter made his life miserable. She decided then and there that when Uncle Ron shouted at Hugo again, Hugo wouldn't have to go through all that alone. She would be there, right by his side, defending him no matter what it takes.

* * *

><p>Lily woke on Christmas morning to the familiar sight of her room at the Burrow and Hugo sleeping on the bed beside her. She looked at her watch and saw it was just after seven. Then she realised what day it was and smiled, before realising this meant being with her brothers and exchanging presents. When she and Scorpius had gone shopping for her dress in Diagon Alley, she'd bought both Albus and James their presents. She'd thought she'd be the bigger person, but now she was dreading it. She didn't want them to read her name on the card and then toss the present aside. She thought about sneaking downstairs and removing the presents, but eventually decided against it. She needed to do this.<p>

James had been flat out ignoring her since she got back home, but Albus was the complete opposite. He was slipping in little snide comments about her every chance he got, and Lily was rather impressed that he could come up with them by himself. Of course, he probably didn't. They were probably just things he'd heard James say, but she was bemused that he wasn't following James' lead and ignoring her.

After a few more minutes of lying in bed, she decided it was time to get up. She wasn't surprised at her earliness; Lily always woke up early on Christmas morning. She used to wake James up and together they'd wake Albus up – it always took more than one person to wake Albus up. Of course, this year she didn't do that. Instead she got washed and dressed, and headed downstairs. She walked into the kitchen and made herself some breakfast, and sat at the table and ate. She was the only one up, so she sat alone. When she finished, she wandered into the lounge and looked at the presents under the tree. Lily saw lots of different colours of wrapping paper, but only one green present. She knew instantly that this one was for her from Scorpius. The green was accompanied by a silver gift tag, and Lily smirked; she knew he'd done it deliberately to drive her brothers insane.

She glanced at her watch and saw it was quarter to eight. She made toast, scrambled some eggs, poured a glass of pumpkin juice and carried it up to hers and Hugo's room, where Hugo was just waking up. She laid down the tray beside him, and his face lit up at the sight of it. Immediately he started shoving food down his throat.

"Oh Merlin, Lil, this is amazing." He said through a mouthful of toast.

"You could tell just from the way you eat that you're a Weasley," She smirked, and Hugo grinned.

"I'll take that as a compliment."

"You shouldn't."

Once Hugo had finished his breakfast and got washed and dressed, he and Lily walked downstairs and out the back door into the garden. They stomped about in the snow in their boots and threw snowballs at each other. They made snow angels – Hugo drew devil horns on both of them – and signed their names underneath.

They didn't notice Dominique come outside until they were both hit by snowballs that neither of them threw. They turned around and saw Dom smiling cunningly. A snowball fight between the three of them ensued, ending up with none of them being able to see from the amount of snow on their faces. Lily heard Hugo call for a time out distantly, and she managed to wipe enough snow from her eyes to see the other two. They were both drenched in snow. Hugo was trying to shake snow from his ears, his curls sticking to his forehead. Dom was laughing, her platinum blonde hair looking perfect even when windswept and her skin glowing. All three of them looked at each other and silently decided to go back inside.

Lily looked at her watch and saw it was now nine o'clock – about the time her grandmother got up. Sure enough, when they got inside they heard Molly Weasley's voice sound from the kitchen.

"Merry Christmas, dears! Try not to get too much snow on the floor, would you?"

The three grandchildren called a 'Merry Christmas' back to her and took all their winter clothes off and placing them on the hook beside the back door. Lily looked at Dominique and saw that her long legs were encased in a pair of black skinny jeans that she paired with plain white top. Lily thought it was amazing that even in the simplest clothes her cousin looked gorgeous. And it wasn't even that she was part Veela, Lily didn't think, she was just confident. She was pretty, and she was confident with herself.

Lily herself wore her own skinny jeans, almost identical to Dom's, paired with a studded belt and her favourite cropped leather jacket over a white vest top. She looked at herself and noticed that she was wearing was very similar to Dom, except Lily had added things that she knew would drive her father crazy. Not that that was why she wore them, of course; that was just an added bonus.

The three cousins all went and sat down in the lounge; Dominique sitting on her favourite armchair and dangling her legs over the arm while Hugo and Lily sat on the sofa, Lily stretching her legs out onto Hugo's lap. They sat talking and laughing about nothing in particular until eventually the rest of the cousins woke up and came downstairs. Hugo shuffled closer to Lily to make room for Lucy, who smiled warmly. Lily was technically only fighting with Albus and James, but as Rose and Fred were their best friends she supposed it was only inevitable that they wouldn't be speaking to her much either. Rose had never really spoken to her much really, but Lily knew that now it was more of a pointed silence, especially as Lily was supposedly corrupting Hugo. As far as Lily knew, she had no problem with any of her other cousins, but that didn't mean it wasn't awkward. They were all Gryffindors after all, and, with James and Albus being the Golden Boys of Gryffindor, they had to be in on the Lily Torture Parade – that was what Scorpius had called it.

Lily's father, Uncle Ron, Albus, and James were the last ones down, and something in Albus' eye told Lily they'd been talking about her. But before she could wonder what about, Lily saw Ron's glare fixed on her and Hugo. Hugo seemed to notice this too, and threw his arm around Lily. She saw Ron clench his fists as he sat down on the chair beside Lily's father, and she heard Hugo stifle a laugh.

Molly handed out the presents to everyone, and Lily paused when unwrapping a present from her parents to watch her brothers open their presents from her. She saw them both tense and look at each other before opening them. Lily had bought them both Quidditch supplies, and she saw the conflict in James' mind as he looked at his gift. She knew a part of him wanted to thank her but the other part of him wanted to just discard the gift and throw it away later. Albus had no such trouble, and immediately tossed the present aside after opening it. James apparently decided to do the same, and put it with the rest of his presents – more carefully than Albus had, though.

Lily went through present after present, and she couldn't keep her stomach from sinking a little bit each time she didn't read her brothers' names. She was opening her second to last present when she accepted that they didn't get her one. There was only one gift left under the tree, and it was the one from Scorpius. She knew her grandmother had left it there on purpose so she could see what was inside it. Molly handed it to her granddaughter and Lily could feel the tension in the air.

She unwrapped the present quickly, not wanting to prolong the stares. Inside she found two boxes. On one of them the words _Marc Jacobs _were written on the lid. Inside was a small perfume bottle with the name _Daisy _on it, with a small note attached to it:

_If you're wondering why you've never heard of Marc Jacobs before, it's because it's a Muggle perfume. And I couldn't find one that was called Lily, so I thought that I'd just go for another flower name. Besides, according to my mother it smells 'divine'. –S_

Lily smiled and put the box to one side. The other box was smaller; a jewellery box. She opened it and saw a small silver chain with an 'R' attached to it.

"Oh that's pretty! Who's that from, Lily?" Lily's mother said, although Lily was sure she knew already.

"Scorpius."

"Ha, he didn't even get her name right!" Lily heard Albus laugh, but she was too busy at the note that she held in her hand.

_And red, if your brothers think I got your name wrong, tell them that I said they're idiots, but I love them anyway. Haha, Merry Christmas, Lily! I'll see you soon. –S_

"Al, save yourself the embarrassment and just shut up." Hugo said, taking the note from Lily's hand and passing it to Albus. Lily saw Albus' face grow stonier with every word he read. He looked up at her and snarled and threw the note back to her. Lily smirked, which only seemed to make him angrier. James' expression was unreadable, but Lily was sure that he wanted to shout at Lily as well. Not that either of them could, of course, not with their parents and grandparents there. Lily knew this, and James knew this, but Albus seemed to have forgotten. He opened his mouth to speak but James reached out and grabbed his arm. Albus looked around at James and Lily saw the plea in her elder brother's eyes. But it wasn't for her. James didn't stop Albus for Lily; he stopped him so his little brother wouldn't get in trouble. Because, of course, he wanted to maintain the illusion that they were innocent in all of this. That it was completely Lily's fault.

Lily swallowed the anger that was rising up in her throat and smiled at her brothers, making Albus' face angrier while James' expression was still blank.

"Hey, Lil, can I try that?" Dominique spoke, ripping Lily from her thoughts. Dom nodded towards the perfume. Lily passed the perfume to her favourite female cousin and watched her spray it and sniff the air. "Ooh, that's so pretty! I may be stealing that." She laughed.

"Or you could just be extra nice to Scorpius to get your own." Lily grinned.

"Hmmm, I may have to try that..." Dom joked. "When are you next seeing Scorpius, anyway?" She asked, and Lily saw her father and her brothers tense. She ignored them and answered her cousin.

"I don't know, soon I guess. But when we do meet up again it'll probably be the whole gang, so Hugo would be there. You're welcome to come along, if you want." As Lily spoke, she saw Ron's face turn purple, and she heard him mumble something quietly about turning lions into snakes. She was sure no one else heard it, and decided to pretend she hadn't either.

"Yeah, I just might. Sooner or later you just get bored of hanging around the same old people, might be refreshing to get some new scenery. Know what I mean?" Dom said as innocently as she could, but Lily heard the inclination behind it that she knew was meant for her brothers and smirked.

Dinner was served shortly after and Lily thought she was going to explode; her grandmother's cooking was way too good. Once they'd both finished, Hugo and Lily excused themselves and they both gathered their presents and took them up to their room.

"That's the beauty of having a big family; lots of presents!" Hugo joked.

"Well what else are they for?" Lily laughed.

"So anyway, I was thinking," Hugo started, "I want a new look. Actually no, scratch that, I _need _a new look. I don't like the clothes I have now. They're just not me. And besides, they're clothes that _he_ approves of. What better way to get back at him than be myself?"

"I think it's perfect." Lily grinned.

"So I was thinking that whenever we next meet up with Scorpius and that lot, we could, and I can't believe I'm going to say this, go shopping."

"I think that'd be great. What kind of clothes are you looking for?"

"Kind of like the stuff you wear. I like the studs and the leather, and it goes with everything. But I do like Louis' beanie though. Think I could get away with one?"

"Sure, just make sure Louis is okay with you stealing his thing." Lily joked, and Hugo laughed. "Hey, I know what you should get!"

"What?"

"You should get a Muggle ear piercing. Like just a stud. It'll look awesome, and it'll drive your dad insane."

"See this is why I love you, Lil. You come up with the best plans."

"I guess I was just born that way." Lily grinned

"But how am I gonna get that done?" Hugo asked.

"Dominique can do it."

"Huh?"

"Yeah, when she got her bellybutton pierced we were talking and she said that her friend had also wanted hers done but didn't have the money, so Dominique did it for her. She did her bellybutton and three piercings in her ears."

"Wow," Hugo raised his eyebrows in approval. "Talk about a Rebel Weasley."

"I think she'll be okay with passing that title down to you." Lily smiled.

"That title is as good as mine." Hugo joked.

"You know, she could probably pierce your ear tomorrow if we ask her really nicely." Lily said thoughtfully.

"Yeah, we'll try tomorrow then," Hugo agreed.

"It's a plan." Lily said as she climbed into bed and switched off the light.

"Hell yeah."

"Damn straight."

"Night, Lil," Hugo laughed.

"Night, Hugh." Lily smiled.

"Hey, it's Rebel Weasley now!"

Lily laughed and curled up under the covers. She closed her eyes and felt herself drifting to sleep, dreaming of ear piercings, perfume, and a ruffle of white blonde hair.

**A/N**

**I'm so sorry! I'm on holiday and my internet wasn't working and I've only just today been able to get on and upload this, so I've given you a long chapter with a lot happening to make up for it.**

**Next chapter will be the beginning of school again, and I'm thinking about about making the rest of this year and next year go fast as quickly as possible, so Lily may be in third year before you know it.**

**The song in this chapter is _Over My Head (Cable Car) - The Fray._**

**In this chapter I've also addressed something I know a few of you have asked about: how much older they seem. If you noticed, I put in the line "Ever think we're way too young for all of this?". The fact that Lily feels she's too young to have to go through this and that she's had to grow up fast will be a recurring thing, so please don't think I'm forgetting their age or something.**

**Anyway, I promise not to leave it too long next time. I'm going to try and finish the next chapter in the next week, but I apologise if I can't get it up; the internet is terrible here. **

**Reviews are much appreciated,**

**thank you!**

**beccasophX**


	8. I'm Still Hiding Underneath

_SUMMARY: Lily has always lived a shadow, whether it was her brothers' or her father's. So when she finds herself with the enemies of her brothers, how will they take it? And what about Scorpius Malfoy, who always seems to have an eye on her? Lily goes through drastic changes in perspective, and she starts to wonder, are her brothers really the Golden Boys everyone says they are?_

* * *

><p><strong>NOT JUST A POTTER<strong>

**I'm Still Hiding Underneath, It's Been A Long Time**

_Two Years Later_

"Oh, Lily! Make sure Scorpius doesn't get into too much trouble for me, would you?" Astoria smiled at the thirteen year old warmly as they stood on the platform.

"I'll try, but he's very stubborn." Lily grinned, and Scorpius put on a mock offended look.

"How dare you, mother! I am never in trouble!" Scorpius laughed. Astoria laughed back and kissed her son on his cheek.

"Have a good year, Scorpius." She smiled as she hugged him. She then turned to Lily, and pulled her into a hug as well. "You too, Lily. We'll see you at Christmas."

Scorpius and Lily waved goodbye to Draco and Astoria and walked away. They were about to board when Lily caught sight of flaming red hair out the corner of her eye. She turned and saw her family – her _old _family – staring at her. She looked over each and every face and saw what they were feeling. Ron looked angry, as usual, but he also looked slightly uncomfortable. Hugo looked unhappy, but grinned at her when she met his gaze. He gave her a slight nod as if to say _I'll meet you in a minute_. Rose had a look of contempt on her face that sent chills down Lily's spine, but it was nothing compared to Albus' pure look of loathing. She passed over him quickly, not bothering to even wonder why he hated her now more than ever. Her father had his hand on her mother's shoulder, as if he was holding her back, and Lily saw his lip curl slightly. Then her eyes landed on James. She didn't know she'd been dreading looking at him until she finally set eyes on him, but she had. Because she knew what she'd see: nothing. There was nothing there. Not hatred, not anger, not sorrow, just nothing. He was looking right through her, like she didn't even exist.

"Come on, Lil." Scorpius said quietly, breaking her thoughts.

"A lot has changed in two years." She smiled emptily. She threw them one last look over her shoulder before boarding the train. "Let's go."

They found the rest of their friends quickly, and they all managed to cram themselves into one compartment. Lily was quiet most of the journey, lost in her thoughts. She couldn't help but think about what she'd said. That a lot had changed. Because looking around at her friends, she knew it had. Everyone was so different, yet exactly the same. She often wondered how this could be, but right then she knew it instantly. They weren't different at all. She was. She had a new family, new life, new her. Everyone else was the same; she was just a different person when she saw them.

"Hey, watch it, that's my sister." Adrian said, grinning, snapping Lily out of her thoughts. She turned her attention to an entwined Hugo and Effy, the latter of whom had her middle finger stuck up at her brother as she smiled through the kiss.

"Just because you're jealous your sister gets more action than you do." Scorpius smirked.

"Come on, man, that's my sister!" Adrian groaned, and then paused and turned to look at Effy. "Who is only thirteen and should not be having any action of any kind until she is at least thirty five."

Lily laughed along with the rest of her friends, and felt herself quietly slipping back into her thoughts. She only noticed that the train had stopped and they had arrived when Hugo shook her gently.

"Come on, cuz. We gotta go."

He helped her up and threw his arm around her shoulders as they walked. "How've you been?"

"Okay, I guess. Better." Lily said, unable to keep her voice from cracking slightly as she spoke.

"Hey, if it makes you feel any better, I spent most of my summer yelling at Ron." Hugo smiled. He never called Ron "dad" anymore. He thought he didn't deserve the title. Lily was silent for a moment before answering.

"I'm proud of you, you know. For staying. For standing up to them. I ran away, but you stood your ground. I'm proud of you, Hugh."

"Sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do. I honestly believe leaving was the best thing for you."

"It was. It really was. And I'm doing better without them. It's just... seeing them at the platform... I don't know, it just shook me up a little." Lily shook her head. "It's stupid really. It's just that every year I have this stupid little fantasy that I'm going to see them there and they're going to hug me and cry with me and James will talk to me and everything will be okay again. I can't help but miss them, you know? I don't want to and it's stupid and I don't like it but every time I see them I feel like I'm being punched in the stomach over and over again."

"Hey, if it's worth anything at all, they miss you too."

"Really?" Lily asked, trying to keep the hopeful tone from her voice.

"Really. But don't go back. Not yet, at least. Just sort things out with you before you go back, promise?"

"Promise."

* * *

><p><em><strong>Flashback<strong>_

"_Hugo! How are you?" Aunt Ginny came up and hugged me._

"_Good, actually, yeah, how about you?"_

"_Oh, I'm fine, you know, same old thing." She smiled. "So, what's new with you? What've you been up to?"_

"_Nothing much really. Just hanging out with my friends really." I shrugged._

"_If you can call _them _friends." I heard my dearest daddy mutter, and then I realised that everyone was listening. The air was thick with the silence, and I hated it. So I decided to give them what they wanted._

"_Yeah, just hanging out mostly," I continued as if I hadn't heard him. "You know, with Effy, Scorpius, Adrian, Jay, Lily..." _

_I held back a smirk as the whole living room of the Burrow became still. After what seemed like forever, Aunt Ginny coughed._

"_Well, it's, um, it's good that's she's doing okay."_

"_No, it's not." Albus stood up suddenly. He walked over to me and put his lips close to my ear, but still spoke loud enough that everyone could hear it. "Tell that bitch she can go to hell."_

"_Albus! That is your sister!" Ginny shot up; obviously hoping no one noticed how she fumbled on the word _sister_._

"_No." Albus shook his head. "No, she's really not." _

_He kicked the sofa and ran upstairs, throwing one last look behind him. But it wasn't aimed for me, his mother, or his father. It was aimed at James, who sat in his seat staring vacantly at the spot that Albus just stood on. That's all he did now: stare. He never showed any emotion, any _love _for this family. And everyone just wanted to believe that James had just grown up over the last two years but I knew better. He stopped showing his feelings when Lily left. He still loved her and cared about her, whether he wanted to or not._

_**End of Flashback**_

* * *

><p>"Hey, red," Effy called across their room. "What's going on with you?"<p>

Lily's head snapped up and she realised she'd been staring into space thinking about how everything had changed for her, because she still didn't know fully whether it had changed for better or for worse. She was fine now, she was happy, she was better, but she didn't know if all these changes would turn out to be good in the long haul.

"Just thinking, I guess."

"Okay, but we've going down to dinner. Are you coming?"

"I'm not really that hungry, I'll just stay up here. But tell the others I said hey." Lily smiled, and Effy studied her for a moment.

"Okay, sure." She said eventually, and Lily waved at her best friend as she left the room. As soon as the door closed, Lily sighed and lay back. She needed to think, to clear her head, but the air felt too thick around her. She needed to get out. She left the room and walked quickly to the place she didn't know was her destination until she got there.

The Astronomy Tower was beautiful at night. The moon shone brightly in the velvet sky, bathing the entire tower in its silver light. The floorboards creaked, but Lily loved the sound. It reminded her of all the times she and her friends had gone to the Shrieking Shack during the last three years. She knew there was an appropriate memory with James buried in her head, but she refused to remember it. All she could think of was his vacant stare. It was like she wasn't even there. Or maybe it was that he wasn't there. Either way, in that moment Lily knew something, something she'd known for a long time but she'd refused to believe. She knew she'd lost him. He wasn't her big brother anymore. He wasn't James anymore. He didn't _care _anymore.

Lily felt like someone had slapped her.

She sat down on the hardwood floor and looked up at the sky. She felt tears fall down her cheeks heavily, and before she knew it she was sobbing harder than she could ever remember, her head buried in her knees. She lifted her head and realised that this was the first time she'd cried since the night she left her family. Since the night she joined her new family. She wiped her tears away furiously as she thought of Astoria and Draco. She was a Malfoy, whether it was legally her surname or not.

* * *

><p>"I'm so jealous of you, Lily." Dominique complained as she sat down next to Lily at the Slytherin table for breakfast the next morning. She'd sat there for the last two years, and, just like Hugo, she had become an honorary Slytherin. She and Lily had become closer and closer over the years, as had she and Scorpius, with whom she had a very strong brothersister relationship with. In fact, they were so close that Scorpius had even taken to calling Dominique his little sister, which increasingly annoyed Dominique.

"Everyone is," Lily joked, and Hugo scoffed into his pumpkin juice.

"Ha-ha." Dom smirked.

"So go on then," Lily rolled her eyes. "Why are you _so jealous _of me?"

"Because you don't have to hear our family go on and on about Quidditch, or have them try and drag _you _into doing things you would honestly rather kill yourself than do, and you most certainly do not have to listen to a certain Weasley family member tell my dad that my _unsavoury associations are bringing shame to the Weasley name_." Dom ranted while piling toast onto her plate. Hugo almost spat out his drink.

"A certain Weasley family member? That'll be my dad then." He muttered

"Yup." Dom replied, popping the 'p'.

"I can't wait until I turn 17 and I get my money. When that happens, I'm out of his house in a second." Hugo grumbled, and Effy kissed his head, which he responded to by entwining himself with her.

"What did your dad say?" Lily asked Dom.

"He told him that I would be friends with who I wanted, blah blah blah, was he really saying that I can't hang out with my cousins, blah blah blah, and all sorts of stuff. Your dad got kinda mad." She added to Hugo.

"I swear to Merlin I'm going to kill him one day." Hugo muttered through his embrace.

"That's lovely, sweet cousin of mine." Dom grinned. "But anyway, I'm so jealous of you, Lil, because you don't have to listen to all that crap."

"Yeah, definitely glad I'm not you." Lily nodded, smiling.

"Weasley! Potter!" A familiar voice called from behind them, and all three of them swivelled in their seats to see Scorpius standing behind them next to Adrian and a pretty blonde Ravenclaw girl.

"Oh dear, what do you want, Malfoy?" Dominique said in a perfect imitation of Scorpius' drawl.

"Good morning to you too, little sister." Scorpius smirked.

"Malfoy, I am only a few months younger than you." Dom scowled.

"Yeah, yeah, whatever, little sister." He grinned, and bent down to kiss her head and ruffle her hair. Dom slapped his hand away and tousled her hair back, grimacing. "Anyway, this is Adrian's new girlfriend, Stacey Whitby." He said, gesturing to the girl standing next to him and Adrian.

Lily studied the girl for a moment. Her hair fell in curls, and she wore a blue hairband. Her tanned skin was blemish free, and she had hitched up her skirt to show off her long legs. Stacey waved nervously at Dom and Lily, who both smiled at her.

"Hey," Lily grinned, and Dominique shrugged. No matter how close Dom was to all the Slytherins, she never lost her 'Ice Queen' personality. Stacey smiled nervously at them as she sat down opposite them next to Adrian. She seemed to be more nervous to sit down at the table than meet Adrian's friends.

After Stacey had left to go meet her friends ready for her first lesson, Lily turned to Adrian.

"So Stacey seems really nice."

"Yeah, great in bed, too." Adrian grinned, and Scorpius laughed and fist-bumped him.

"That's charming, Zabini." Dominique rolled her eyes, a habit which she claimed to have developed from Lily.

"Thank you, my love." Adrian winked. "But try not to get too jealous, baby, okay?"

"You know, I think I'll manage it." Dom grinned, getting to her feet. "Well, anyway, I've got Herbology with the Wonder Boys, should be fun. You know, I didn't speak to them before and they were absolutely fine with it. I don't speak to them now, and it's like a criminal offence or something. I blame you." She added to Lily, grinning.

"You look amazing walking away from me!" Adrian called as Dom crossed the Great Hall.

"Try not to fall asleep and dream about me, you don't want to ruin your sheets." She replied without turning around.

"Fair point, I do have Divination." Adrian commented to the rest of the group.

"Why did you even take that?" Scorpius asked.

"Easy O. All you have to do is lie and be like 'I see myself dying a painful death in my seventh year by the hands of... a Gryffindor, dun dun dun!' and she loves you."

As breakfast finished, the Slytherin crowd slowly diminished and Lily, Effy, Hugo, and Jay made their way to DADA. As they were all walking, Lily suddenly felt... happy. She was just very happy. She didn't know what it was but she knew there was something missing, but she decided she could live without it for the next few years if all days were like this. She was home.

* * *

><p>The day went by quickly, and before Lily knew it, it was time for dinner. The day seemed to have gone abnormally fast, although Lily wasn't complaining. Adrian was talking about Stacey to Scorpius – a conversation that Lily was desperately trying to block out – when Dominique suddenly turned to Lily.<p>

"Oh my gosh, that reminds me!" She exclaimed, whacking her on her arm.

"What?" Lily grumbled, rubbing the spot where she was hit.

"I was going to introduce you to one of my friends. He's lovely, and, not going to lie, attractive would be an understatement." Dom grinned, and Lily shook her head in exasperation.

"Thanks, baby," Adrian winked, and Dominique pretended she didn't hear him – although Lily saw the corner of her mouth twitch.

"Are you ever going to stop trying to set me up with people? I'm 13!" Lily groaned.

"So? You haven't dated anyone since Elliot and that wasn't really a relationship. I mean, you were 12," Dom sighed.

"I bet you'd already done a lot when you were 12." Adrian muttered, raising his eyebrows at Dom.

"Anyway," Dom shot Adrian a look, "I'll go get him. Stay here."

Elliot had asked Lily out in the beginning of their second year. Dom was right, it wasn't exactly a relationship. But then, Lily supposed, was there any ever real relationships at twelve years old? Lily had ended it when she'd realised she thought him very... vanilla. He'd been fine with her decision, but he wasn't close with her or any of her friends anymore.

Lily was in conversation with Scorpius and Adrian when Dominique had come back over, a guy in tow.

"Lily, this is Jacob Crawford. Jacob, this is my cousin, Lily Potter." She said, grinning at her younger cousin. Jacob was tall, with coffee-coloured skin. His smile was wide and showed off his perfectly white teeth, and he stood in a way that emphasised his muscles, but didn't seem to know he was doing it.

"Hey," He said, extending his hand towards Lily. She flashed him a brilliant smile and took his hand.

"Okay, well why don't you two take a walk? Yeah that's a great idea, go, shoo!" Dominique said excitedly. This was some of the most fun she got, Lily thought.

"Lily?" Jacob smiled.

"Sure, okay." She smiled back, and Jacob took her hand in his and led her out of the Great Hall. She looked over her shoulder and saw Adrian and Dominique in conversation, and Scorpius staring at his empty plate like he was willing it to be full again. She mentally shrugged, and turned back to Jacob.

"I'm sorry if she forced you into this. She can be very scary." Lily laughed, and Jacob grinned.

"Na, I wanted to meet you." He said, flashing her that brilliant smile once again.

"Really?"

"Beautiful, fun, and up for a laugh? Why wouldn't I want to meet you?" He smiled shyly, looking towards the floor, and he reached out for her hand. Lily accepted it, although her hand didn't feel right in his. She ignored it and focused on what he was saying. "Anyway, I really want to get to know you, Lily."

"There's not really that much to know." Lily shrugged, and Jacob's face fell slightly. "But I'm sure we can find something to talk about." She said, raising her eyebrows.

"I was sort of thinking if maybe you wanted to go out on the first Hogsmeade weekend?"

"Oh, um, I sort of have plans with my friends on the first weekend. It's sort of a tradition of ours. But I have no plans for the one after that."

"Okay then, so second Hogsmeade weekend?"

"Definitely."

"Cool, okay. We should probably get back to your friends. I'm sure Scorpius and Adrian will be dying to ask me some questions or something." Jacob said, running his hand through his hair.

"What do you mean?"

"Well they're just really protective of you. Everyone knows it." Jacob explained. "I think it was in Defence when I think Albus started talking about you and Scorpius turned around and punched him. Right in the nose. Looked painful, but it was damn funny. Merlin knows he's been begging for a face punch for years." He continued, but Lily had stopped listening for a few minutes. She had no idea that Scorpius had done that. She hadn't heard anything of it, although she didn't know how _that _was possible, and she'd made a point of trying to avoid Albus altogether. She didn't know that Albus' comments about Lily annoyed Scorpius that much. Lily had stopped listening to them, but she supposed other people definitely heard them. She was kind of _touched _that Scorpius would do that for her.

She didn't realise they'd walked back into the Great Hall until Jacob let go of her hand. She looked down at his hand and wondered why he'd dropped it, but she shook the thought from her mind as they reached the Slytherin table. Jacob sat down next to Lily and as soon as they were seated Adrian and Scorpius each took out a piece of parchment.

"Okay, Crawford, we've got some questions for you." Adrian said, obviously fighting to keep a straight face.

"Shoot."

"What are your intentions with Lily?" Adrian read off his parchment.

"Have a good time and see where it takes us." Jacob smiled. Adrian noted the answer down, sticking his tongue out of the corner of his mouth as he wrote.

"Lily lives with me. Would this mean you would be around the Manor a lot?" Scorpius asked.

"Er, maybe, I guess that's up to Lily?"

"Wrong. That's up to me. Get it together, Crawford." Scorpius shook his head, stifling a laugh.

The questions continued for a few more minutes, and Lily found herself lost in her thoughts once more. They were acting like they were her _brothers_. They were the closest thing she had to brothers now, she thought, and she knew she preferred them over her biological brothers. Yet, she couldn't stop herself from looking over at the Gryffindor table, her eyes immediately finding James.

As if he could sense her eyes on him, he looked up straight at her. And she saw him. Just for a split second, but she saw him. She saw his anger, his pain, and his sadness. She saw everything. And then he shut himself off again. His eyes glazed over and he looked back to his empty plate. But in that split second all her memories came flooding in.

* * *

><p><em><strong>Flashback<strong>_

"_So _snake_, having fun with your Death Eater friends?" Albus whispered to Lily, giving her an evil smile. They were eating dinner, and their father was in conversation with their mother and James, so they didn't hear him._

"_Go to hell." Lily hissed back, at exactly the moment when her father finished speaking._

"_Lily, that is enough!" His knife and fork clattered onto his plate. "This has gone on long enough! Have your brothers even done anything to you?" Harry stood._

"_I think the question is what did I do to them, actually, but as usual you only hear their side!" Lily stood too. Her father had been making little remarks like this ever since they'd been home for the summer. Harry opened his mouth to speak and Ginny tried to stop him, placing her hand on his arm. "No, let him speak. He's been suppressing this long enough. He might as well just say it."_

"_You're right, it has been long enough! I've been trying to give you time to turn yourself around but you haven't made any effort to." Harry shouted. "You, Lily Luna, have _shamed _this family! And not only that, but you've also turned Hugo against his own father!"_

"_What are you talking about?! We all know Hugo and Uncle Ron's problems started _long _before I was Sorted!"_

"_This is nothing to do with your Sorting!"_

"_Oh yeah?" Lily scoffed. "Then what's it about?"_

"_It's about your constant arguing with your brothers!"_

"_And when do you think that started, oh yes, that's right, at my Sorting!" Lily screamed. "Whose fault is it that my family can't accept me as a Slytherin then, _Daddy_? Is it mine?"_

"_Yes! You shouldn't have been one!" Harry blurted out before he could stop himself and Lily snapped._

"_You know, I seem to recall you telling Albus when he was worried about being a Slytherin that it was absolutely fine if he was one and it didn't matter to you!" Lily yelled. "Talk about a double standard!"_

"_GO TO YOUR ROOM!" Harry bellowed. Lily grabbed her empty plate and threw it at the wall, making it shatter into a thousand tiny fragments and stormed upstairs without another word._

_She slammed her door and immediately grabbed a piece of parchment and a quill and wrote a letter to Scorpius. She sent it and told Remus to make sure Scorpius got it within the hour. Then she grabbed a bag and packed a few overnight things. She waited for forty five minutes before Remus returned. She read the piece of parchment quickly and then headed downstairs with the bag._

"_I thought I told you to go to your room!" Her father shouted when she entered the living room._

"_You did," Lily replied calmly, "But that's not far enough away from you."_

_She stepped into the fireplace without another word and yelled, "_Malfoy Manor!" _leaving a swirling image of her shocked parents behind her._

_**End of Flashback**_

* * *

><p>Lily was pulled out of her thoughts by Jacob.<p>

"So, second weekend, yeah?" He asked.

"Yeah, definitely." Lily confirmed a little dazedly. He kissed her cheek and stood up from the table to go back and join his friends.

She didn't pay much attention after that; she couldn't keep her mind away from that night. The night she'd lost one family and gained a real one in the space of a few hours. She couldn't stop thinking about her _old _parents' shocked faces, Albus' triumphant although slightly surprised expression, and James' vacant one. James' expression had confused Lily the most then. He hadn't done that before. He'd never looked right through her before. That was when he'd stopped seeing her. When she'd left. That was when he'd stopped caring.

That was when she'd stopped being his sister, in her mind and in his.

**A/N**

**Okay, so I'd originally planned to do a time jump in like chapter 10, but nothing _really_ interesting was going to happen and I was getting so bored of first year. **

**I've rewritten this chapter over 400 times I swear so I hope you guys like it!**

**I'm really sorry I keep only updating like once each month. I've got most of the chapters planned out, it's just sometimes I have no idea how to get to them so I just get writer's block and I literally just stare at a blank page.**

**Reviews are very much welcome,**

**thank you!**

**beccasophX**


	9. There's Silence Now

_SUMMARY: Lily has always lived a shadow, whether it was her brothers' or her father's. So when she finds herself with the enemies of her brothers, how will they take it? And what about Scorpius Malfoy, who always seems to have an eye on her? Lily goes through drastic changes in perspective, and she starts to wonder, are her brothers really the Golden Boys everyone says they are?_

* * *

><p><strong>WARNING<strong>

**This chapter contains material that some readers may find upsetting.**

* * *

><p><strong>NOT JUST A POTTER<strong>

**There's Silence Now and Nothing More to Gain**

"Hey, cupcake." Scorpius voice sounded from behind Lily. She would've been surprised had she not become so accustomed to him being there. In fact, she'd be a little unnerved if he wasn't next to her – not that she'd ever admit that.

"Cupcake?" Lily raised her eyebrows.

"Yeah, get it?" He grinned. "Cupcake, as in red velvet." He said it as if it was the most brilliant thing he'd ever thought of, and Lily burst out laughing. Lily was sat at the black piano in the common room, as she usually was at this time in the morning, and Scorpius had taken a seat behind her on the shiny black leather sofa. "Come on then, cupcake. Do your thing." He grinned, waving his hand towards the piano. Lily rolled her eyes but still she turned back to the piano and started playing.

_Sing me to sleep_

_Sing me to sleep_

_I don't want to wake up _

_On my own anymore_

_Sing to me_

_Sing to me_

_I don't want to wake up_

_On my own anymore_

Lily finished the song and turned around to look at her best friend. Scorpius was looking at her – just looking – but it was different. He was looking at her differently than he had just a few minutes before. She didn't know if it was good or bad, but before she could ask him he stood up and sat beside her on the piano bench.

"Teach me." He said, and Lily smiled. The next hour was spent teaching Scorpius to play the song, and he was learning quite quickly.

"You're learning very well, Mr Malfoy." Lily grinned.

"Why thank you, Miss Potter." Scorpius smiled back, and held Lily's gaze. Lily felt her eyes slide down to his lips, and she noticed what a nice shape they were. She looked back up at his intense, silver eyes and then back down to his mouth once again. She leaned in to him slightly, and she felt him do the same. His eyes burned into hers, his face just inches away from hers. Lily saw him close his eyes and she did the same. She felt his lips just slightly touching hers and she went to lean in further–

"Hey gu– whoa!" Adrian's voice startled the both of them and they snapped back from each other instantly. "Er, sorry. Didn't mean to interrupt..." Adrian said, and Lily saw a faint smirk.

"No, don't worry, you weren't interrupting anything." Lily said, and she could feel her cheeks flushing.

"Are you sure? 'Cause I can just go back up–"

"No," Scorpius interrupted, "Lily was just teaching me how to play this song on the piano." Lily turned to Scorpius and saw his cheeks were a little pink. "Right, Lil?" His silver eyes had one last spark left them.

Lily hesitated a moment before turning back to Adrian.

"Yeah, that's right."

* * *

><p>"Guess who," Jacob's voice sounded from behind Lily and hands covered her eyes. Inwardly, Lily groaned; that was the cheesiest and stupidest thing anyone could ever do. Beside her she heard Scorpius turn a snicker into a cough, and she couldn't stop the giggle escape her lips. Fortunately, Jacob seemed to think she was laughing because she thought what he was doing was funny. She knew Scorpius knew why she was really laughing, however, because he nudged her slightly with his elbow.<p>

"Mmm, let's see. Sexy voice, big hands–" She said, trying to make the game a little less lame and groaning silently as she felt herself failing.

"I know what you're thinking, red, and no, it's not me." Adrian said, and Lily heard his smirk. Jacob laughed and sat down beside Lily at the Slytherin table. It'd become a habit of Lily's to sit with her back facing the Gryffindor table; she was tired of seeing Albus' glaring looks every day and she hated seeing James' vacant stare. She didn't really like seeing any of her old family; she knew from Hugo and Dominique that most of them thought her petty and bitchy so she didn't want to see the looks on their faces. She was just glad she had Hugo, Dom, and Scorpius. They were her family, and they were all she needed.

"So, babe," Jacob started, and Lily noticed Scorpius tense slightly out of the corner of her eye. She shrugged it off and turned to Jacob.

"Yeah?"

"What are you doing later?" He asked, and Scorpius' body went rigid, and Lily saw Adrian's do the same.

She ignored them, "Er, I don't know, why?"

"I wondered whether you wanted to sneak out tonight and have some fun. What do you think?" Jacob said, and Lily felt herself groan inwardly once again. It wasn't that she didn't like Jacob, because she did; she just didn't want to spend a lot of time with him or he would start to annoy her. She knew that made her sound terrible, but it was true.

"Er..."

"Oh, Lil! You told me you were going to help me with my DADA essay, remember? It's due tomorrow. I completely forgot!" Scorpius said, and Lily sent him a grateful look.

"Scor, she can't help you with that, we've got Potions due in tomorrow," Effy jumped in, too.

"Oh yeah! Don't worry, Scor, I'll help you, but I just got to do Potions first," Lily went along, "Sorry babe, maybe next time?"

Jacob nodded, looking slightly disappointed. Lily, feeling bad, grabbed his hand. He smiled at her, but this smile was different than any other smile he had given her. There was something different in his eyes, but Lily couldn't figure out what it was.

What she couldn't help but notice, however, was how her hand didn't fit right in his.

* * *

><p>Four nights later, and they were all sitting in the common room. Scorpius, Lily, Adrian, and Dominique sat on the big, black, leather sofa – well, Dominique was actually sat on Adrian's lap – while the others sat on the armchairs that littered the green tinted room. The reflection of the lake swirled and glimmered on the walls, almost as if the light itself was swimming in its depths. They all laughed at something Hugo had said, and Dominique and Scorpius told a story of what had happened to them earlier that day, at which everyone giggled at as well. Everyone was getting tired when–<p>

"ADRIAN ZABINI!" A shrill voice came from the direction of the common room door; everyone's heads swivelled to see who it was while Adrian paled.

"Shit," he whispered, a hint of guilt making his voice waver slightly. Stacey came charging past the other Slytherins, straight to where they were sitting. Most people had stopped to watch, and the whole common room had gone silent.

"What is _she _doing here?" Stacey snarled at Dominique.

"Er... I... er..." Adrian stammered, and Dom slipped off his lap delicately.

"I should probably go..." She said awkwardly, making for the door.

"Oh no you don't!" Stacey grabbed Dom's forearm, and Lily noticed her wince. As soon as Stacey's hand touched Dominique, Scorpius stood up like a shot.

"Let her go, Whitby," Scorpius growled, and Stacey looked terrified. Lily knew that Scorpius would never dream of laying a hand on a girl, but she also knew that she would never _ever _want Scorpius to look at her with such rage in his eyes. Stacey released Dom, and Dom started to walk to the door again, smiling an awkward goodbye at the rest of the group.

"Filthy tramp," Stacey said, in what sounded like was supposed to be a murmur but instead came out loud. Dom stopped, and the whole common room froze; and Dom walked away, quicker than before. The common room door swung shut behind her, but not before Lily saw Dom wipe at her cheek.

Lily was almost overwhelmed with rage for Stacey, but before she could say anything, Adrian stood up.

"How _dare _you," His voice was quiet, but it shook with anger. "You think just because she was sitting with me you can go all psycho on me? Dom is important to me, she's one of my best friends, when are you going to get that? I'm sorry if she makes you uncomfortable, I truly am, but that's an issue you take up with _me, _not her."

"Adrian, we're _done_!" Stacey yelled.

"Yeah, I think we might be. I'm sorry that I upset you, Stacey. I really am. This is my fault, and I know that. I'm really sorry." Adrian spoke earnestly, and Lily could hear the honesty in his voice. Stacey looked slightly guilty, but the defiant look never left her face as she stormed out of the common room.

The sound of a pin drop could be heard in the silence, and every eye in the room was on Adrian.

"Okay, everyone up to bed, nothing more to see," Christian, the fifth year prefect and a member of their group, called, gesturing towards the dormitories with his arms. Slowly and grudgingly, the Slytherins began to make their way upstairs until there was only Lily's group left in the common room.

Christian sat back down on one of the armchairs, his dark hair falling into his eyes as he flopped down. "Did you see that? I totally just kicked prefect ass." He joked, breaking the silence.

"I'm going to find Dom. Something tells me she hasn't gone back to her common room," Adrian said without turning around, and he ran out of the door, leaving the rest of them sitting in silence.

Eventually they all went up to bed, until it was just Lily and Scorpius left. Lily yawned loudly, and stood up to head off to bed.

"Lil, wait," Scorpius called after her, "I need to talk to you."

"Okay..." Lily said slowly, turning around and sitting back down. "What's up?"

"It's Jacob," Scorpius spoke as though he had been practicing this speech for a while.

"What about him?"

"Well," Scorpius hesitated, and then his words rushed out of his mouth, "Are you sure you can trust him?"

"What do you mean?"

"Well just like, do you even know the guy that well?"

"What are you talking about, Scorpius?" Lily said, her voice rising steadily.

"Is he friends with Albus?"

"No,"

"Are you sure? They both seemed pretty friendly the other day," Scorpius spoke quickly, as though he was trying to get the conversation over and done with.

Lily paused, "You're lying,"

"No, I'm not, Lil,"

"Then you're wrong! You must have seen wrong!"

"Lil, I'm just thinking that maybe this guy isn't who you thought he was," Scorpius said, obviously trying to keep his voice steady.

"What's that supposed to mean?" Lily demanded.

"Nothing, I just don't think he's right for you,"

"Well I'm thirteen; I didn't know I had to find 'the one' right now!" Lily said hotly. "And since when did you have the right to tell me who I could and couldn't date?"

"Since..." Scorpius' eyes burned with intensity and for one beautiful moment Lily thought he might kiss her, and she knew then that she would let him. For a moment, Jacob was forgotten, and Lily was reaching out to pull Scorpius closer.

But then the moment ended.

Scorpius stepped back, creating space between them. "You're right," He said. His voice was softer and the intensity was gone from his eyes. "I'm sorry,"

And he turned and walked up the stairs to his dormitory. Lily didn't move until she heard a door slam shut. She felt her lips tingle, and the fizzy feeling in her stomach was still present. She walked slowly up to her own dormitory and got dressed into her pyjamas. She lay back on her bed, her mind completely blank, not letting herself think because she knew that his name would be the only thing in her thoughts.

* * *

><p>Adrian was ranting about something when Lily sat down at the Slytherin table for dinner the next day.<p>

"Hey, red, do you know what's going on with Dom?" Adrian said, and Lily noticed how concerned he sounded.

"No, I haven't seen her today. But why, is she upset?" Lily asked.

"She's been really quiet and she hasn't even looked at me all day." Adrian answered. "I was thinking it had something to do with Stacey, and then I wondered if it was something else, like if she had spoken to Victoire or something."

"What do you mean?"

"They haven't spoken all summer because they got into a huge fight. She didn't tell you?" Adrian said, his lips parting slightly in confusion.

"No, she didn't." Lily was quite shocked. She was very out of the loop on the family, but Dom was one of her best friends; surely she would've told Lily about something like this? "I'll be right back."

"Let me know if you find her." Adrian said, and Lily nodded.

She stood up from her seat and walked back to the common room and up to her dormitory, where she grabbed the Marauder's Map. She and James had taken it from one of her father's drawers just before James started his second year. In the summer before Lily started her first year James had given it to her as a present, although he kept the Invisibility Cloak. She studied the map carefully and found Dominique's dot on the Astronomy Tower.

Lily headed there quickly, grabbing her wand and stuffing it into her robes. It took her almost ten minutes to get there, but Dominique was still in exactly the same place. Lily's legs ached by the time she got to the steps of the tower, and she took a minute to catch her breath. She really needed to get in shape, she decided. She had Quidditch after all.

Lily climbed the stairs of the tower slowly, her muscles aching. She really had been slacking over the summer.

"Dom?" She called out, and then she saw her.

Dominique was standing in a white dress, too short for November, and bare feet. The wind blew her hair out behind her, but its silvery glow still made her skin shine. But she was standing at the edge of the tower, her arms out, as if she was ready to–

"Dom!" Lily screamed, as she saw Dom let go of the tower. Lily shot forward, grabbing Dom by her waist half a second before it would've been too late. Lily dragged Dominique backwards, collapsing in the corner; Dom sprawled out on top of her.

Lily felt a wave of relief wash over her; she had saved Dom. But then Lily saw her cousin's arms. Every inch of skin on Dominique's arms was marred with cuts and scars; some of them so fresh that blood was still oozing out. Lily looked at her legs and saw that she had cuts there too. Almost every part of Dom's body was scarred. Lily felt the tears roll down her cheeks as she sobbed into Dom's shoulder. How had she missed this? How had she missed that one of her best friends had been going through this? How had she missed this so much that it'd got to the point where Dom wanted to take her own life? How could Lily have done this?

Suddenly, Lily felt Dom's hand clasp around her wrist gently.

"Don't tell," She whispered into Lily's hair, and then she was gone. Sleeping, Lily supposed. Unconscious was more of the word. Lily couldn't help but notice that even in this situation, Dom was so beautiful. Her silvery blonde hair splayed out beneath her still shone, and her skin, however blemished, still glowed. Lily started to cry again, and once she had started she couldn't stop. She just sat there, rocking Dom back and forth and sobbing into her long blonde hair.

**A/N**

**I'm really sorry this chapter is so short, and I'm _really _sorry you've had to wait so long! I've just been really busy and I've had a sort of writer's block for this chapter. But I know exactly what's going to happen in chapter ten, so hopefully it won't be long until that one is up.**

**Like I said, this chapter contains some upsetting material. I really hope you guys are okay with this part. Well not _okay _with it, but... you know what I mean. This is part of Dom, and the story on this does expand so I really hope you guys keep reading and aren't upset or offended by this.**

**Again, I'm really sorry for the wait! You can tell me how much you hate me for it in reviews?**

**thanks guys!**

**beccasophX**


	10. I Run Too Fast or Too Slow It Seems

_SUMMARY: Lily has always lived a shadow, whether it was her brothers' or her father's. So when she finds herself with the enemies of her brothers, how will they take it? And what about Scorpius Malfoy, who always seems to have an eye on her? Lily goes through drastic changes in perspective, and she starts to wonder, are her brothers really the Golden Boys everyone says they are?_

* * *

><p><strong>NOT JUST A POTTER<strong>

**I Run Too Fast or Too Slow It Seems**

**Dominique POV**

"Dominique, part of this deal is that you actually talk to me, you know." Dr Haloway said in her stupid concerned voice. I just looked at her as I sat there with my arms folded. We were sitting in a room of the castle I didn't even know existed, up on the sixth floor. The doctor was sitting at a desk, while I was seated at a large leather sofa that I'm sure was meant to be comfy like the one in the Slytherin common room but really it felt like I was sitting on cardboard.

There weren't words to describe how much I didn't want to be there. But Lily had managed to work this out so no one would know how she found me; not my parents, not anyone. I knew Lily did want to tell my parents, but to be perfectly honest I don't think they'd give a fuck anyway. It would just be something else to make me less perfect that Victoire, and everyone knows how much they love to tell me how much better my darling sister is than me. It's like a fucking hobby or something.

Lily telling Scorpius was just one more thing. I'd made her promise not to but I knew she would eventually; I was dreading it. The look I knew he'd get in his eyes when he'd find out about me is something I would gladly never happen. No matter how much he annoyed me by voicing it, I thought of Scorpius as my brother. No, he _was _my brother. And I loved it. I never had a relationship with a guy that didn't involve sex before. I lost my virginity when I was thirteen, and I think since then all guys saw when they looked at me was just something to screw. If I was honest I'd say I wish I hadn't lost it that early in my life, but who gives a fuck anyway?

So I'd been in the hospital wing for two days as Madam Pomfrey healed me, and I'd made Lily promise not to tell the others where I was, and now I had to attend therapy sessions every day at 7pm. I'd gone to two already and I hadn't spoken at all other than to say good evening and good night when I entered and left the room. I knew they were cutting me a huge break here, not telling my parents and not keeping me in the hospital wing where everyone could see me, but I didn't want to talk to anyone about this. And the last person I would ever want to talk to about anything would be a 'medical professional' who would try to diagnose me with something or, Merlin help me, _fix _me. I was fine.

"What do you want me to say, Doc?" I said, emphasising the bored tone in my voice. "I'm sure you've already made some judgement about me." _That's what everyone else seems to do at least, _I added in my head.

"How about we talk about your cousin?" She said, leaning over her desk and looking me straight in the eye.

"You're going to have to narrow it down there, Doc."

"The one who found you," She glanced at one of the papers on her desk. "Ah, yes, Lily. Why don't we talk about her?"

"What about her?" I frowned.

"How do you feel about her?"

"Well," I started, "She's my best friend. She's the reason I'm so close with the Slytherin crowd."

"Ah yes, I see." She nodded, "But it says here you're not very close with your family. Any particular reason for that?"

"Lily, I guess." I shrugged. "Among other things. Like the fact that they're all pretentious douches, excuse my French."

Dr Haloway chuckled lightly, "How is Lily the reason you're not close to your family?"

"Well, I've never been that close with them, if I'm honest, but now because I took Lily's side in the argument they all look at me like I used the Unforgivables on them or something."

"And you resent her for that?"

"No, not at all," My words rushed out, "I mean, it's hard sometimes, but I deal with it. And, like I said, I was never that close with them anyway."

She made some notes on her clipboard before turning back to me.

"But it's the way you deal with it that we're trying to get to the bottom of here, Dominique." She said it with a smile that didn't quite reach her eyes, and then glanced at her watch. "That's all we have time for today, I'll see you tomorrow at 7." She said, leaning back in her chair and gesturing towards the door for me. I picked myself up off the large sofa and walked out of the room, only to run head first into Scorpius.

"Oh, sorry, hey," I stumbled over my feet again as I tried to rediscover my balance. And then I saw the look in his eyes. "She told you." I whispered, and I found myself unable to look him in the eye. I didn't want to see the disgust in his face; I didn't want to see the revulsion in his eyes. I thought I'd be mad at Lily when she told Scorpius, but somehow I wasn't. I didn't blame her, because I knew I'd do the same. I just felt ashamed of myself. And then I felt his strong arms wrap around me and I was so shocked I almost fell over again. I looked up at him and there was no distaste anywhere in his face; just love. Not in the way he looked at Lily, but in the way a brother would look at a sister.

I felt tears well up in my eyes but I blinked them back and returned his embrace. He stroked my hair and whispered repeatedly:

"Oh, Dommie, it's okay."

He hugged me tighter, as though he was afraid to let me go. We stood there for a long while, I wasn't sure for how long, until we eventually started walking to the common room in comfortable silence, his arm still wrapped around my shoulders tightly.

"Adrian knows, doesn't he?" I said, hearing my voice break slightly and hoping Scorpius didn't notice it. He didn't do anything for a moment, and then he nodded slowly.

"He knew before Lily did," Scorpius said, without looking at me. Not in a bad way, I knew, but because he wasn't sure how to tell me.

"What?"

"He's really beating himself up about it. He knew, Dom. Not for certain, of course, but he knew something was wrong. And he didn't do anything; he didn't talk to you or anything. He just 'let it happen', as he put it. So if he's finding it hard to be around you, don't think it's because of you. It's because he feels guilty. And I know he'll probably feel guiltier for not being able to be there for you. So I'll try to talk to him again."

I stayed silent, thoughts racing through my mind. Adrian thought it was his fault. _Adrian_. Who broke up with his girlfriend pretty much _for me_, thought it was his fault. I knew Scorpius talking to him wouldn't do anything for him, but I could. But not right now. I couldn't. I don't know what it was, but I just couldn't.

I only realised when we got there that Scorpius had been walking me to the Gryffindor common room, which I was glad for because I didn't think I could face the Slytherin one just yet, although I longed for its sofa. He gave me a long hug, gave me a quick peck on my head and ruffled my hair, and then said goodbye.

"I love you, Dommie." He smiled at me.

"Love you too, Corey," I grinned at him. I was the only person allowed to call him Corey, and he was the only one permitted to call me Dommie.

"Night, little sister," He gave me a cheesy smile and then turned and walked away, and I walked into the common room with a smile on my face. I headed straight up to my dorm and got into bed quickly, snuggling up under the warm covers.

I found I was more tired than I'd thought, and my eyes began to well up with tears. I tucked myself deeper into the covers to try and somehow comfort myself, but the tears just kept falling and my arms began to itch.

"I'm okay, I'm okay, I'm okay, I'm okay," I repeated into my pillow. If I said it enough, maybe I'd start to believe it myself.

* * *

><p>Lily and Jacob had been dating for a while now. Well, a while for a thirteen year old. I guess for Jacob it wasn't long at all. But Lily looked happy, and I think that's what really matters. Scorpius thought I didn't notice his face whenever she and Jacob were together, but I did; he clenched his jaw, gritted his teeth, and balled his fists. I was sure that one day he would've just punched Jacob just for being with his girl, but he never let it show when Lily looked at him. I swear that girl is more clueless than he is; I'm almost certain he doesn't know himself how he feels.<p>

Jacob came over to Lily at dinner like he always did, his hands covering her eyes and Lily becoming internally mortified. Scorp and I always got a good laugh out of that. Jacob was my friend and all, but he wasn't half a loser.

"Dommie, have you noticed anything weird about Crawford recently?" Scorpius whispered to me.

"You mean how he's been talking to Albus? Yep, I was going to talk to Lily about it later," I replied in hushed tones.

"I already did; she, er, didn't believe me,"

"Okay, so what do we do?" I asked, and Scorpius looked at me and bit his lip.

"Let me handle it, don't worry about it," He said eventually, and then he went back to his food. I knew why he was saying that, so I dragged him away from the table and into the corner of the Hall.

"Scorpius, I'm _fine_. I don't need you to baby me," I said, a little quieter than I'd hoped to.

"No, Dom, you're not fine. Do not tell me you are because I know you're not." Scorpius said without missing a beat. He ran his hands through his hair and sighed. "And I can't help you and it kills me so I have to baby you, because I need to help my sister."

"So help me by treating me normally!" I said, again a little quieter than I'd planned to; I looked down at my feet and then looked back at him. "I'm okay, Scorpius. Honestly." I looked at him earnestly, and when his expression didn't change I sighed loudly and sat back down. He wasn't ever going to believe me.

It was then that I wished Lily had never found me.

"I gotta go, babe, the guys are waiting for me. I'll see you tomorrow?" Jacob said to Lily, and he kissed her goodbye and headed out the doors. I felt Scorpius' tense form sit down beside me and I honestly wasn't sure whether it was because of me or because of Jacob.

All three of us finished our dinners with small conversation, and then joined in with the conversation the others were having about Quidditch; riveting stuff. Scorpius helped me up from my seat as we left, and I'm sure he saw me flinch slightly as he touched my arm but he didn't say anything.

"Hey, what were you guys talking about?" Lily asked us.

"Adrian and Stacey," I lied easily, "We didn't want to interrupt you and Jake so we figured we'd just talk away from you."

"Oh, how come? Anything new?"

"Not really, just–" Scorpius stopped when he heard Jacob's voice.

"Yeah, Al, it's all good," he was saying. Lily walked quicker, walking to the end of the corridor so she could see around the corner. Scorpius and I followed suit, and saw Jacob laughing with Albus, a grin plastered on his face. "I got her wrapped around my little finger."

"So, soon then?" Albus enquired, and Scorpius and I exchanged confused looks, while Lily's eyes widened with horror and filled with tears as if she knew what was going on.

"Yeah, I was thinking as soon as this weekend. And then I get my money, right?"

"It shouldn't be that hard to get her into bed, she is a right little tramp. And don't worry; you'll get your money. What did we decide on, 50 galleons?"

I saw Scorpius' face fill with rage and his fist rose, but before he could do anything someone else knocked him sideways. A mess of jet black hair stormed towards Jacob and Albus, and before either of them could utter his name he raised his arm and punched Jacob right between the eyes. Jacob fell to the floor, moaning in agony.

"Don't you even try to fucking touch her," James spat at him. He then turned to face Lily, Scorpius, and I, and it was the first time in years I'd seen any emotion in my cousin's eyes. His eyes were full of rage when he looked at his brother and Jacob, but when he looked at Lily his face softened, and he looked... sad. He looked remorseful, and he looked pained. James then looked at me, and I saw his eyes were full of sorrow toward me as well, but then he looked at Scorpius. There was no sorrow there, but there was no anger either. No hate, no rage, but understanding. He nodded at Scorpius – a nod which Scorpius returned – and then walked quickly away from the scene.

Lily stood with her eyes wide, wiping furiously at her sodden cheeks. Scorpius' face had turned back to angry as he looked at Jacob. I noticed that Albus had fled the scene, but this time I wasn't sure whether he'd go after James or not. Albus had become scarily good at being James, so much so that he had begun to surpass his older brother, and he was becoming his own person. I would've been proud if I didn't despise his 'own person'.

Scorpius walked to Jacob slowly, his lip curling maliciously.

"You're lucky I don't murder you right here," He snarled into Jacob's ear, "But, you see, I'm not a dickhead. That's you." Scorpius foot connected with Jacob's stomach hard and fast; I probably wouldn't have noticed it if Jacob hadn't doubled over in pain.

Scorpius then put his arm around Lily and steered her towards the common room. Lily was still in shock, her eyes wide and her lips parted slightly. I grabbed a hold of her hand and led her along with Scorpius towards her common room, setting her down on the large leather sofa. She immediately lay down and curled up in a small ball. She closed her eyes and eventually her breathing started to slow. I conjured a thick soft blanket and covered her with it, and Scorpius sat in the armchair next to her, and I knew he wouldn't leave her side until she woke.

So when I saw Adrian out of the corner of my eye, I knew I could go. I needed to talk to him now. I was _able _to talk to him now.

"Hey, Adrian," I called to him. His head snapped up and looked at me. He immediately looked back down at his feet but he stayed still, allowing me to walk up to him. I threw Lily one more glance over my shoulder before speaking. "Can we talk? In, er, private, I mean." I was suddenly more nervous than I thought I'd be, and I willed my hands to stop from shaking.

"Sure, come on," Adrian responded after a moment of silence. He held out his hand for me to take and led me up to his dormitory. He gestured for me to sit on his bed so I took a seat, not being able to help but notice how comfy it was.

"Scorpius told me what you thought," I said. I wasn't sure how to start, so I figured I'd just get straight to the point. "And you can't believe that. It's not your fault. It was just a... weak moment. No one was supposed to see that."

"But I did, Dom. I saw it. I knew what was happening and I did nothing to stop you." He said, his voice quiet and his eyes refusing to look in mine. "You... you tried to commit suicide, and I could've helped you and I didn't." I flinched slightly at 'suicide', but he wasn't looking at me so he didn't notice.

"Adrian, it's not your fault. Please believe that."

"If it's not mine then whose is it?"

"_Mine. _It's _my _fault, Adrian." I stood up, forcing him to look at me. "I was the one doing it, and it's not like I told you. It's _my _fault."

"No, Dom, it's not–"

"And I'm still doing it! I'm still trying to convince myself and everyone else that I'm fine and that everything's okay and I'm not!" My eyes filled with tears. "I'm not okay, Adrian! I'm not okay and I don't know what to do," I felt his arms wrap around me tightly, differently to Scorpius'; warmer, stronger, safer. I sobbed hard into his shoulder, and he stroked my hair slowly, whispering something into my head that I couldn't quite get.

He sat me down on his bed in silence, and then rummaged through his drawers and pulled out a t-shirt emblazoned with a faded logo of an old Muggle band. I could just make out _My Chemical Romance_, and then he tossed me the shirt. It would've been slightly big on him, which meant it was huge on me. The hem stopped at mid-thigh, and I tucked myself into his bed. Slowly and silently, Adrian began undressing, taking his shirt off and then his trousers until he just stood in his boxers. He did all this without stopping looking at me, and I took in his body with admiration.

Unhurriedly, he climbed into the bed with me, and wrapped his arms around me. I hadn't realised I was cold until his skin brushed mine, his touch spreading warmth to even the tips of my fingers. He looked at me intensely, and then he kissed me tenderly. It was over quicker than I'd hoped it'd be, but I knew then that he was all I wanted. But not tonight. He knew it too. He entwined his fingers with mine and kissed the nape of my neck gently, and then he closed his eyes. I snuggled in closer to him, and I fell asleep to the sound of his breathing.

**A/N**

**So what do you think about Dominique's chapter? I wrote this chapter a few times in Lily's POV but it felt better doing it in Dominique's. Let me know what you think.**

**thanks guys!**

**beccasophX**


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